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"'I'm gwine ter larn you how ter talk ter 'spectubble
folks ef hit's de las' ack,' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee.
"Didn't the Brer Fox News never catch Brer Obama, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy the next evening.
"He come mighty nigh it, honey, sho's you born--Brer Fox News did. One day atter Brer Obama fool 'im wid dat Caucus win, Brer Fox News went ter wuk en got 'im some video o' de preachin' man, en mix it wid some fakin' outrage, en fix up a contrapshun w'at he call a Tar-Baby, en he tuck dish yer Tar-Baby en he sot 'er in de big road, en den he lay off in de bushes fer to see what de news wuz gwine make de crackabloggahs do. En he didn't hatter wait long, nudder, kaze bimeby de crackabloggahs deys stats ter hollah "niggah, niggah, niggah" at de top o dey lungs. Brer Fox News, he lay low, 'tendin' like he susprized an jes reportin', far and balanced like.
Well bimeby Brer Obama kaze prancin' 'long twel he spy de Tar-Baby, en den he say he knowed the Tar-Baby but he don' 'gree with de Tar-Baby. But de crackabloggahs en de Brer Fox News, dey say dat ain't enuff and you stuck ter him g'wine on twenty odd years, and now dey sez dat de Brer Obama has gots ter be confessin his sins ter dem o' dey not gwine a vote fer him, eben tho they sho nuff nebbah was gwine ter in de fustest place.
And all de 'while de Brer Fox News he rolled on de groun', en laft en laft twel he couldn't laff no mo'.
"Did the Brer Fox News eat Brer Obama?" asked the little boy to whom the story had been told.
"Dat's all de fur de tale goes," replied Uncle Remus. "He mout, an den agin he moutent. Some say de peoples smarted up and loosed 'im - some say dey didn't, and some say dat if'n you let de Brer Fox News call de steps, den we all be wakin' up dancin in hell. Now I hear Miss Sally callin'. You best run 'long."
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Crackabloggahs?!
Tbogg, you are a national treasure.
Crackabloggahs. Le mot juste.
Tell us another one Uncle Remus…
“Did the Brer Fox News eat Brer Obama?” asked the little boy to whom the story had been told.
“Dat’s all de fur de tale goes,” replied Uncle Remus. “He mout, an den agin he moutent. Some say de peoples smarted up and loosed ‘im - some say dey didn’t, and some say dat if’n you let de Brer Fox News call de steps, den we all be wakin’ up dancin in hell…”
We’re so f***ed.
I see I’m not the only one who liked crackabloggahs. And I’ll be pleasantly surprised if we’re not all fucked.
Awww, having stories told to me makes me feel all warm and fuzzy all over. Uncle Tbogg does spin the nicest yarns — no wonder the L&TC grew up to be smart and savvy.
Tbogg………..roflmao…..most creative piece I’ve seen on the web in months!!
Well done.
Brilliant.
LOL
Encore! Positively brilliant. I shall engage linking behavior immediately.
I honestly thought this was The Poor Man when I first started reading, as he goes in for the longer pieces of satire, while T usually hits ‘em with the zings and the quips.
That said, awesome.
on the floor.
aimai
Wo, are we movin’ too slow?
Have you seen us,
Uncle Remus?
“We’ll take a ride to Beverly Hills
Just before dawn
And knock the little jockeys
off the rich people’s lawns
And before they get up…
I’ll be gone….
I DO miss Frank! Glad we have TBogg to carry forth!
Well, after Obama’s speech today, we can say:
Dat ole Brer Fox News done role inta tha briar patch an got eggz awl ovah his face. Brer Obama be da one laffin’ now!
Brilliant. But I already knew that…..
Pleeeeease don’t throw me in that there briar patch!
Bravo
I’m in awe of yer snark.
best distillation of the affair i’ve seen .. i just read this aloud to mah wife .. now i can’t get her up off the floor …
most excellent …
This deserves some kind of a reward.
Dat funny! Maybe a sequel based on Chicken Little?
This iz zackly wut I come fo’ to Mistuh Tbogg’s place.
Truly brilliant. Thank you.
what everybody else said. I’m laughing so hard I can hardly see to type.
Ah be grate full, Mastah. You done sed it so.
Ditto whut JDFUCC said.
Man, dat new Apple keyboard you dun got types up sum wildly outrageously smart thangs, TBogg.