Hit him again just on principle

I’m going to skip the weekly Shorter Bill Kristol because his column this week is a tribute to Tony Snow and mocking it would be more awkward than the glances Larry Craig receives every time he enters the Senate Executive Washroom.

Instead we’ll just jump jump jump jump around.

  • Regarding the New Yorker cover outrage du jour, Jake Tapper leaves his lunch pail in the truck, orders a shot and a beer at the bar, pulls a bandanna from the pocket of his work pants, wipes the sweat and grime from his face and neck, and then writes:

The sophisticates at The New Yorker….

…meaning that Jake is making a play for Tim Russert’s "just a blue collar guy" crown. Yeah, Jake. You blend.

  • Strangely the New Yorker cover is getting more attention than the Weekly Standard  did back in the day.
  • McCain surrogate Carly Fiorina visited the the Tim Russert Village Green and Shrineatorium and made this observation:

“I don’t think Americans are paying attention to what’s being said by campaign surrogates. They’re paying attention to what’s being said by the candidates themselves.”

At which point Tom Brokaw should have kicked her chair out from underneath her like the HP Board did for wasting his and America’s time.

Miss Venezuela was a worthy winner, but I don’t think this year’s Miss Universe competition will go down as one of the classics of the genre.

Um. Okay. I’ll take your word for it. It wasn’t Super Bowl XXXIV. Sure. Whatever.  While I can understand why some call the Academy Awards the Gay Superbowl, I honestly don’t know any men who actually watch beauty pageants. Or, as a friend put it, "I’m gay but I’m not that gay."

In the wake of former Sen. Phil Gramm’s statements earlier this week about this being a nation full of whiners, the good folks at ABC’s "Good Morning America" brought on a consumer psychologist Sunday to discuss whether or not the McCain advisor had a point.

Shockingly, not only did Kit Yarrow tell host Kate Snow that "the way consumers feel about things is very emotional," but also these "emotions are trumping reality" thereby creating a snowball which makes the economy worse.

Yarrow not only believes that things are "not as bad as consumers feel like it is," but also that the media are at fault because "everything is described as a crisis."

I shall notify the Gonzales family of San Diego:

Jacqueline Gonzales and her husband, David, a machine operator, can’t imagine how they could cut a dime more out of a budget that allows them just $15 every two weeks for their big splurge: takeout from McDonald’s.

Saddled with payments on a gas-guzzling truck and SUV and facing escalating food and gasoline costs, the Poway couple expect they’ll be left with few options to economize should gasoline prices continue their rapid ascent. For now, their $925 monthly rent is reasonable, but any increase could be financially debilitating.

“We probably wouldn’t lose our housing, but we’d probably lose our vehicles,” said Jacqueline, 25, a stay-at-home mother of two young children. “I’d probably have to get a job working nights, which really would hurt because family time is very important to us. It does scare me.”

Determined to pay off debt while also struggling to make ends meet on a monthly income of $2,100, the Gonzaleses are among a growing number of households trapped in the financial vise of rising costs, most notably fuel.

I suspect that a pack of granite counter-top sniffing dogs will have been deployed by this time to find out why the Gonzales family is trying to harsh America’s prosperous glow. Better ask for those green cards too. Because, well, you know