Well Color Me Disappointed, I had to get another glimpse into the pathetic mind of K-Lo again. She really is quite a sad creature, isn’t she?

Add Bon Jovi and Springsteen to the long list of things K-Lo never got: Dick. A face that doesn’t scare horses and small children. A sense of style. A sense of humor. Two distinct eyebrows. Well, the list goes on, and the Internet doesn’t have enough space.

I think I can sum it up: What K-Lo doesn’t have? A life.

I checked in with Fox Noise after the speech, and it looked like my teevee color was screwed up — all their faces were green.

Can Johnny Mac top that? Hahhahahahahaha! I can’t wait.

K-Lo is disappointed? I’M disappointed. Her gang was promising a Greek Temple and, I suppose, appropriate rituals. I didn’t see any of that.

Tell if his reading of his large print speech doesn’t sound like your great uncles brilliant imitation of Lawrence Welk?
And Pantload has officially crossed over into some winger nightmare of permanent delusion. Morning Swim has link.

K-Lo consoled herself with her new friend nicknamed “Electro-Mitt-II” and a 16 pack of AA’s.

Normal Americans [Kathryn Jean Lopez]

Are telling me it was a “mean” speech.

You found my favorite comment of the whole day – and it’s from K-Lo!

Funny, in so many ways, it deserves a Golden Globe or something.

Mean?

“Normal Americans”?

The mind reels.

John McCain was a prisoner of war? Why haven’t I heard about this?

Best comment of the day. Definitely.

I do plan on stealing it, too.

Hmmmm. Accorging to K-Low, Barack made a mean speech? It’s not like he called his wife a c–t. Woman, get thee back to Operation Battery Operated Boyfriend.

John McCain picked Sarah Palin for VP.

She has five children: Track, Bristol, Willow, Piper and Trig.

You don’t think those names are going to be a source of snark from our man T, do you?

One can only hope…

Hard to fuck with Trig, honestly…And Track is going to Iraq.

McCain just undermined his entire “not ready” campaign against Obama by picking an inexperienced 44-year old, for whom that line of attack is untenable, obviously.

McCain ‘08: the worst campaign in the history of Presidential politics presses on, taking what’s left of the GOP on it’s lemming-like drive to the sea…

Trig and Track? Like Frick and Frack?

And Track is going to Iraq.

When will he come back?

Hell, this is already sounding like Dr. Suess.

Paraphrasing Office Space:

Peter Gibbons: What would you do if you had a million dollars?
K-Lo: I’ll tell you what I’d do, man, Bon Jovi and Springsteen at the same time, man.
Peter Gibbons: That’s it? If you had a million dollars, you’d do two dudes at the same time?
K-Lo: Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had a million dollars I could hook that up, cause dudes dig a chick with money.
Peter Gibbons: Well, not all dudes.
K-Lo: Well the kind of dudes that’d double up on a chick like me do.

Hey K-Lo had two distinct eyebrows, but she plucked the upper one out. stolen from an old Carol Burnett skit

Normal Americans are telling me it was a “mean” speech.

And the guy cooks up a mean arugula omelet, daddy.

Normal Americans wouldn’t want to talk to K-Lo.

This is her equivalent of the Bangalore cab driver voices in the Moustache of Understanding’s head.

It was his White Album of speeches. He’s saving Abbey Road (side 2 of course) for January 20, 2009