I have informed my Dear Children that some astronomer who was able to recreate the sky of the past determined that

a) the “star of Bethlehem” wasn’t really a star, but Mars + Jupiter or Mars + Venus or some such; and

b) the appearance was in AD 2, on June 17, which happens to be my birthday — the June part, not the AD 2.

The holiday came first, but it had a different name.

It’s a special day, very near when the days start getting longer. In the depths of winter, nothing could be happier. As long as humans have observed our natural world, we’ve celebrated this day in some way.

Appropriated by the Xtianists for their Son of God’s birthday when the pagans wouldn’t give up their winter celebration.

what if the merry gentlemen don’t want to rest? perhaps they want to keep being merry

Listening to xmas tunes all day w/ the little ‘warblers today (yeah for his and her matching Nerf™ guns!), I was struck as always by the vaguely disturbing mix of bizarre pseudo-secular traditions and equally bizarre religious mumbo-jumbo. The lyrics to the Elvis’ classic, “Here Comes Santa” go something like, “Hang your stockings and say a prayer, ‘Cause Santa Claus comes tonight… Santa knows that we’re God’s children, That makes everything right… Let’s give thanks to the Lord above, ‘Cause Santa Claus comes tonight.”

I’m sorry, but where in the Bible does it mention Santa Claus?

Which brings me to this little nugget of seasonal joy: Hank Snow’s God is my Santa Claus (warning, sound). Don’t know what’s worse, really, the schmaltzy lyrics or his voice…

The real Santa was a pagan Viking:
http://www.beforesanta.blogspot.com/

What is the beige thing with the white spot in the middle of the cake? Is it a baby jesus swaddled or is it a penis?

looks a bit like a boggle-eyed owl to me.

that would be tboggle-eyed, no?

That is one helluva confused cake.

I played with my band at a party on Saturday night. I introduced a song by saying that we wanted to celebrate the real meaning of Christmas.

And we played The Beatles’ “Yer Birthday.”

Arthur C. Clarke’s The Star, one of my favorite short storis in my “Soon-to-be-ex-Catholic” phase, offered a slightly different vision.

those bastards, they killed Kenny

you have to ask if it was a coincidence

much like Lou Gehrig catching Lou Gehrig’s disease

The Crown o’ Thorns.

Looks like a severed thumb with fungal disease on the nail. That goes with the spirit of the holiday, doesn’t it?

Harrrumph! “Here’s Comes Santa Claus” is a Gene Autry classic, thank you very much.

When it comes to Christmas and The King, it’s “Blue Christmas”.

I thought it was 4 B.C., before Herod “Slaughter of the Innocents” kicked it.

Damn this new scholarship shit. I can’t ever keep up.

a) the “star of Bethlehem” wasn’t really a star, but Mars + Jupiter or Mars + Venus or some such; and

b) the appearance was in AD 2, on June 17…

My copy of Stellarium (open source, awesome, http://www.stellarium.org)shows only Mars and Uranus at that date, and of course you can’t see Uranus with the naked eye.

Steverino is right, you cannot see uranus with the naked eye. You usually need a mirror, unless you happen to be very very flexible.

In the bible, god lists all the holidays he orders to be observed. Funny, but christmas isn’t mentioned. It wasn’t until around 300AD that there was any mention anywhere of celebrating the birth of Jesus.

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revpaperboy: Boo! Hiss!! (ok. your comment was kind of required. the set-up was too easy to pass.)