What if it’s Debbie Schlussel? Can penises be concave?

Actually, the “secret special guest” will be Erick in his “superhero” costume, Captain Conservative! Penises will actually fall off.

When one of your highlighted guests is ‘the guy who had a kiosk selling anti-Obama stuff and got thrown out’, then you know you’re doomed. I mean, that’s not a very exciting slogan at all. Sheesh.

Seriously. One of the people here who can pass for a nutter NEEDS to be at this thing next year (if, indeed, they actually do it again) because I NEED to know firsthand what batshitcrazynuttygoodness they will be spreading around.

I draw the line at pictures, though. I don’t want to throw up my breakfast.

We’re also going to do two workshops. One will be on becoming better online activists and the other on being better offline activists.

Big problem is they really have no material to work with in the first place.

Oh and the fact they are morans anyway. Also.

Well, with that crowd I’d bet more penii would be standing at attention for Captain Conservative, ready to report for dude-ty, than if any conservawhore like Paylin was there.

Hey, they should also get the guy holding that famous “Morans” sign. What an all-star crew they could have…Joe the Plumberbutt, Kommander Kiosk, and Jim-bob the Moran!

His usual modesty prevented EWE from mentioning the other workshops:
Original Thinking – And How to Avoid It
Racism: It’s the American Way!
Red Dawn: Great Movie or the Greatest Movie?
Redecorating Mom’s Basement: How WalMart Can Help You Create the Ultimate Bachelor Pad

From the comments at the Red Ship Lollipop;

‘m hoping to make the 1st hour and then
head out to the Braves game…
-bags64

With that kind of dedication, my worst fears have been confirmed. The Gathering of Goobers is the spark in the pile of wet cardboard that ignites the new revolution.

Call to arms! I will fight back this evening by phone banking all my liberal friends to warn them of the coming hordes. Well, for about an hour, then I’m going pop a heiny light and watch my new netflix arrival, seasons one and two of Bosom Buddies.

To the barricades!

At almost any convention, no matter how nerdly, people get crazy laid. It’s just a natural fact.

But this one here? This would be the exception to that rule.

Rather difficult to believe that any mall — in a recession! — is gonna “throw out” any paying vendor.

I smell FAKE.

It sorta smells like FAIL. You know, just like Atlanta in August.

Sorrreeee, but I’m not currently on speaking terms with anyone I detest enough to send to fucking Atlanta in fucking August. Actually, those I do know of that ilk are too fucking dumb to be reliable reporters. OTOH, mebbe some of those fucking useless fucking fucks would like Hotlanta enough to stay, which would be a BIG fucking improvement for Pennsylvania. Do you know if there are any faith based federal grants for white supremecist groups that would cover moving some or all of those motherfuckers from the Lehigh Valley to, say, Buckhead nee Irbyville?

Gosh, KJL, glowing with a coat of climate induced Mitt mist, wet yet very, very stanky. There’s a fucking soft on for ya.

Seriously. One of the people here who can pass for a nutter NEEDS to be at this thing next year (if, indeed, they actually do it again) because I NEED to know firsthand what batshitcrazynuttygoodness they will be spreading around.

That’s one heckuva a grenade your asking someone to throw themselves on. I think a prerequisite to this mission will be having a strong public option in place that covers mental healthcare.

I’m going. I’m gonna do it. I am from this moment forward gonna plan to attend next year’s conference. Send money to TBogg and he’ll send it to me, lots of money people, I’m poor and live in a rural area, remember?

So whaddaya say Mr. Bogg? An onsite reporter at the 2010 Conservacon, or me standing outside your house next June whilst visiting family in Dago holding a 1980s era boombox over my head playing an endless loop of Nickleback, Bacharach and Styx? The ball, as they say (unless you’re one of those pansy liberal men who have been turned ball-less by their “feminist” wives or live-in girlfriends [whatever THEY are, pssh]) is in your court.

Mister Leonard Pierce from Sadly, No! went undercover to CPAC in 2008. His “The Beast is Red” blog posts were sublime.

Mister Leonard Pierce from Sadly, No! went undercover to CPAC in 2008. His “The Beast is Red” blog posts were sublime.

Some of the writing ever to grace the intertrons.

At your service, it seems like it was this guy who got booted:

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,534989,00.html

Although Googling “kiosk anti obama” brings up a couple of places this has happened.

Back to work……………..

Hey,I live in Atlanta,don’t wish these fuckers on me. It’s bad enough out here in the Metro without more of these assholes running loose.

So…is this a hard bacon crowd, or a soft bacon crowd?

If Eric says 250, bet the under – I’d discount his estimate by 80%.

hard bacon ..soft bacon … nawww jaw-jah is the home of all-you-can-eat deep fried fatback ….

which is also why they’re one of the highest ranked in heart-attacks …

smirking shitheads wallowing in determined satisfied ignorance.. the fuckers are so far behind .. they think they’re a lap up …

It’s not a bacon and playdoh crowd, I can tell you that.

First they came for the kiosks.

-G

any bets he got booted not because it was anti-Obama but because some of the crap he was selling was openly racist???

The comments section is pretty lame, too. Once someone starts discussing droughts and rainfall in the area, doesn’t that pretty much tell you that the Big RedState Sheebang is going to be a Huge Suck?

Ewe Rickson [sic] is an inspiration to us all.

“Tonight, we’ll hear from Roy Blunt, Pat Toomey, Jim DeMint, and Rick Perry. Then we’ll watch a special presentation of John Ziegler’s new movie.”

All the smack from every poppy field in Afghanistan couldn’t render me comatose enough to sit through that bullshit.

Come for the bacon, stay for the craaaazy!

I’m confused. Why would K-Lo’s boner shrink?

As we get older and stop making sense, you won’t find her waiting long. Stop making sense, stop making sense…stop making sense, making sense. I got a girlfriend that’s better than that and nothing is better that this ( is it?)

Next year!

I’d love to have the short sleeve dress shirt concession at that gathering.

Me too. In fact I hit the downtown connector headed south just as Erik bin Erik and the Rotekapelle backed up northbound in Henry County (as usual). Also as usual, Henry County police were writing speeding tickets, although no one could move.

People, I would do it myself, but I’m Asian, and I can’t pass for Michelle Malkin. I got tats and a brain. So, it’s up to one of you stalwarts. humboldtblue can do it. I’ll pass a few bills TBoggs’ way to get ‘er done.

Nah, you want to get the Cheetos & Diet Mt. Dew concession.

Sure, you might be tempted to rekindle the radical spirit of the 60s by lacing the Cheetos with acid, but the problem is that no one could tell the difference. Delusion in, delusion out.

It’s a real pity the Mark Sanford who this week said “Never tell your wife you are unworthy of her. Let her find out for herself,” couldn’t be there. He has so much to teach fat impressionable basement dwellers. Like how to pretend the farts coming out of your mouth smell like roses.

Shhh! If you people keep talking about Atlanta, they’ll notice the pit and wipe the foam off their mouths.

Holy shit. Liz Cheney? The dominatrix of the delusional? Oh, man, this is gonna be good. Surely one of you can get a ticket at this late date (I bet they have tons of space) to witness this decadence in person!

Can’t anyone round Atlanta swing by the hotel and snap a few pics outside the venue? They usually post the rooms for each event somewhere. Need independent estimate of crowd size.

No, he most likely got booted for selling his “opinion.” While a shopping mall may be a public place, it is not considered a traditional public forum in most jurisdictions, and the mall security people are free to ask you to leave and have you arrested for tresspassing if you don’t–just like Ziegler’s little misadventure at USC.

Atlanta in August; bacon-cheese-burgers and beer in the Moultrie Ballroom, and Lynn Cheney in leather. What more could a wingnut want?