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Creepy non-resident-of-NY23 accounting guy Doug Hoffman has discovered that there may be enough not-yet-on-the-books votes to make him the President of North New York and this he knows because Glenn Beck told him so:
Conservative Party candidate Doug Hoffman tried to reopen the NY-23 race this afternoon. Two weeks after he conceded defeat to Rep. Bill Owens (D), Hoffman attempted to take it all back in an interview with Glenn Beck.
Beck who championed Hoffman during the race, asked Hoffman if he regretted conceding in the wake of new poll results that show him losing to Owens by a narrower margin than was projected on election night. Some Hoffman supporters have held out hope that the 10,000 absentee ballots currently being counted by election officials in New York could reverse the election night result, which saw Owens become the first Democratic representative from the district in over a century.
Today, Hoffman seemed willing to oblige their fantasies.
Since Hoffman and the conservatives already declared a win by losing this means that Doug Hoffman can now win and therefore not win-lose! And if he loses again that means he will double-plus-good win and he gets two not-counts votes in Congress.
For those interested in what the framers thought of “unconceding” an election we turn to Federalist 22 where Alexander Hamilton wrote:
The organization of Congress is itself utterly improper for the exercise of those powers which are necessary to be deposited in the Union. A single assembly may be a proper receptacle of those slender, or rather fettered, authorities, which have been heretofore delegated to the federal head; but it would be inconsistent with all the principles of good government, to allow “tap tap no take-backs, no erasies”. Also. Wolverines!
You can look it up.
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HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! LMAO. ameriKKKa’s First Fascist, Alex H.
Ah, that graphic makes me think of Seanbaby — the original reason I signed on to the internets.
Oh goody. Another Glenn Blech noncontroversy takes wing. That appendix thing didnt slow him down one bit.
How does the super duper rockin’ capitalist Hoffman have time for this? Who is watching the Hoffman Family Enterprises?
Who is giving people advice to invest in AIG, GM, etc? Who is gathering crumbs and outlandish fees from the debt burden that buries companies in the M & A world? Who is on late night television shouting about the insane deal he has on a 1987 Yugo? And who is boarding up the homes he built that he can’t sell that have turned into crack dens?
Heavens, I believe he may have gone Galt.
Math is haaaaaaaard! They are tripling down on batshitcrazystoopid, aren’t they? I hesitate to even dream up more ridiculous scenarios because sure as shooting, these nutters will exceed them.
Hoffman should try for a take back because the only reason that true conservatives lose elections is the foul plotting of George Soros carried out by the elite ninjas of ACORN. That and the fluoridated water that has sapped and impurified our precious bodily fluids. Also.
If there’s anything that will permanently kill Doug’s nascent political career stone-cold dead, it’s publicly dancing to Beck’s crazy-daisy tune. “Wait, Doug, run for president! Run for king of the world! Lick my hemorrhoid operation scar! Dance, my little puppet! Mwah ha ha ha!”
That would be true in the normal world. In the alternate reality of the Teabaggers, Beck is Paul Revere and Hoffman a Minuteman. Look for Hoffman to leverage his fifteen minutes of fame by going on tour to give paid talks wherein he explains how others can achieve “victories” similar to his own.
Well, how do you expect him to yell “I wuz robbed!” if he concedes he lost?
Since the republicans have forgotten how to laugh, there is no longer any question that we’re laughing at them.
Nah, he’s got a world class spleen.
Nothing gives journalistic insight that sharp edge like a Valium drip and a month’s supply of Percocet!
You can look it up.
Hey, I think you know what you can do with your “facts” and your “knowledge” and your… “word” things.
Palin/Oatmeal 2012, bitches!!