I’m surprised that he didn’t use the words “mashie” or “niblick” in there somewhere…

Domestic violence is very funny, Mistah Kurtz, when practiced by the fairer sex upon their mates, eh? Or not.

I don’t know what Howard Kurtz’ talent is. He can’t write, he is an ordinary thinker, he is not funny, he does not have charisma (physical or otherwise) and as a media critic, he just seems to exist in a netherworld of disengagement (and happy to be there).

I’m trying to teach my students that in reading non-fiction, it’s important to keep two things in mind (well, among others): purpose and audience. Identify the writer’s purpose and and audience and you’ll get the argument and come that much closer to passing one of Bush’s fucking standardized tests.

Which is a long way of asking this: what is the purpose of Howard’s work? Who is his audience? Why is this man drawing a paycheck from anyone not in the door-greeter or food-service industries?

Kurtz should stick to his own knitting, whatever that may be. I’m starting to think he can write about anything he wants, although he said a month ago he’d only Twat about weather and recipes.

His purpose is this: The WaPo’s publisher can say, whenever asked,

“Why, yes, we have a media critic!”

That’s it.

Knowing that Howey is a name dropper, I’d like to join his company with my own name dropping golf story.

In 1991 Annika Sorenstam and I, sharing a beer and looking below at a party by the pool in the apartment complex where she lived in Tucson, foresaw the day when Tiger Woods would regret the strength with which a women could use a driver.

All true except the T Woods shit, her and I having mutual friends… Fun in the sun!

Sounds like being teed off is par for the course for Mrs. Woods.
Hyuk, hyuk!

Seriously, if you do a Google image search for “clueless douchebag” you’ll get back about 100,000 pictures of Howard Kurtz. I can only conclude that hack journalists must give great head because Fred Hiatt just can’t seem to hire enough of them.

I’m actually gonna guess Howard considers domestic violence pretty funny no matter who’s involved.

I’ve refused to learn anything about this “twitter-thing,” but is there any way, as a “follower” of Howie, that one can tweet “you useless douche” so that all who follow him can see it?

Mistah Kurtz, he stupid.

Nothing about black men and the magic of a rigid 9 iron? Howard must be slippin’ here… Seriously, Howard, what do you call this kind of prose?

I’m surprised that Howie’s not asking if Tiger hollered ‘FORE!’ before hitting the fire hydrant.

So *that’s* why he wears a divot on his head.

Ow, this is painful. Jeralyn has it exactly right: it is Tiger Woods’s right not to answer any questions.

These gate-crashers decline to go on Larry King for free, which prompts Kurtz to sneer, “How classy.” Which means to Kurtz, it really is classy to go on King for free.

Who says he doesn’t have standards?

I knew a guy named Howard Kurtz in high school. I was a little disappointed the first time that I realized that this Howard Kurtz wasn’t him; not so much after actually reading his stuff.

Jeezus, did $ayrah Paylin write those for him?!?!

Why is it we’re supposed to care about the circumstances behid Tiger Woods’ car crash again?

As a criminal defense lawyer, i know it is certainly tiger’s right not to speak to anyone. That being said, if you or I have an accident resulting in appearing unconscious and unintelligible, we would have an immediate warrant for a blood draw to check for illegal substances. I have represented people arrested after an accident when they did not have excessive amounts of painkillers or other legal drugs.

Just so all of you know, this isn’t how it works for the rest of us. We would have spent the night shackled to the bed frame in the detention unit of the county hospital. I’m not saying it’s right; I’m saying that’s what happens.

And Kurtz is once again an insufferable punk ass jerk.

Why is this man drawing a paycheck from anyone not in the door-greeter or food-service industries?
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Mistah Kurtz has the mysterious ability to find a one-day-old blog that hasn’t even been indexed by Google yet and has only one post up, in which the blogger calls Nancy Pelosi a bitch, whenever he feels like calling her “a [rhymes with witch]” in the Washington Post’s print.

That’s pure gold, brother, pure gold. Talent on loan from Belphegor.