All oiled up on British Petroleum Beach

I haven’t said anything about Rand “rEVOLution v2.1″ Paul because I have learned that you don’t start oooohing and ahhhhing a slow motion multi-car pileup until the last car has burst into flames, inky black clouds of toxic smoke filling the sky, the smell of burning flesh, the screams of the victims, the hush of the crowd… but enough about NASCAR,  here is what we have learned this week about Rand Paul.

He may may (or may not) be a racist. Lesbians can totally throw him using their wicked lez fu. He just won a Senate primary and no one is making sweet love to him on satin sheets strewn with rose petals. And he defends British Petroleum in public where people can see his lips moving and hear his voice, while explaining that, you know, shit happens.

Now Paul is pulling out of his Meet the Press appearance this week because he is afraid David Gregory will get him to say that child-proof caps are socialist or that Goldman Sachs is over-regulated. This is because Rand Paul has libertarian Tourettes.

Personally I kind of hope that Rand Paul wins in the general since that means that Republicans will be trading one asshole only to have another one even assholier hung around their necks.

This is potentially good news for John McCain etc etc.