Remember Christine O’Donnell the anti-masturbation Jesus witch running for the Senate? Yeah, her. Well, she has been keeping a low profile of sorts this week (probably spending campaign contributions on collectible Jesus figurines and a 50-pound barrel of Haribo Gummi Bears at CostCo) but she showed up to put to rest all of those accusations that she falsely claimed to have won the 2007 Nobel Prize for Adorableness as well as matriculating at the five or six colleges that Sarah Palin didn’t get around to attending.
After nearly disappearing from public view following her upset victory in Delaware’s GOP primary, Senate candidate Christine O’Donnell re-emerged Friday, denying reports that she tried to falsify her education background.
[...]
This week, questions were raised about whether O’Donnell had falsely suggested on two online business networking sites, LinkedIn and ZoomInfo, that she had attended Oxford University in England, when in fact she had simply attended a summer program there under the auspices of the Phoenix Institute.
“I know I never created a LinkedIn profile for myself,” O’Donnell said. “I don’t even know what Zoom is.”
All evidence to the contrary:
By now you may have heard that the claim that Christine O’Donnell studied at Oxford has now turned up on a second O’Donnell online resume, this one from ZoomInfo.
I’ve got some more information on what happened from ZoomInfo, and it seems to strongly undercut O’Donnell’s claim that her LinkedIn bio making the same Oxford fib was unauthorized or unknown to her.
To back up: This morning, the Democratic National Committee pointed out that O’Donnell is also described in a ZoomInfo entry as having achieved a “certificate” in “Post Modernism in the New Millennium” from the “University of Oxford.” The Zoom Info entry was labled, “user verified.”
ZoomInfo, which has spent the day looking into this, has sent over a statement detailing what happened with this profile. According to the company, O’Donnell’s profile was claimed in 2008 through something called a “double opt-in process.”
The company says this process cannot function without “response to a verification e-mail message.” ZoomInfo is not releasing that email address, citing privacy. But here’s the rub: The company is confirming that they have identified the emailer….
It is possible that some anonymous hacker went to great lengths to create a LinkyZoomy profile citing O’Donnell attendance at a fancy-schmancy book learning university in an attempt to malign O’Donell as some kind of smart lady elitist to the aced-my-GED-woot! tea bagger crowd who aspire only, Jude Fawley-like, to the majesty that is Glenn Beck U.
But what of that Not Phoenix University, Also Not Oxford University class O’Donnell took for three weeks in the summer of 2001? Did she ace it? Hell, yeah:
Christine O’Donnell was a joy to have in the tutorials: intelligent, engaged, dynamic, good with questions and interested in ideas. Her paper on cloning was one of the two best papers written for me that summer. She successfully completed a rigorous, intellectually demanding course that was the equivalent of a course in the humanities at any graduate school at any university. As a result, I was happy to write recommendations for her for future graduate study.
So there you have it from Bruce W Griffin, official college instructor at…what college was that again?
In the summer of 2001, I was a doctoral student in classics at the University of Oxford, and looking for summer employment. I signed on with a group called the Phoenix Institute to do a tutorial at Oxford on postmodernism and natural law.
This was my second summer with the Phoenix Institute. The Phoenix Institute was a group of Jedi academics; rebels and renegades against the evil empire of politically correct university life. Their summer school at Oxford ran three weeks, and was intended to give intellectual alternatives to the philosophical morass of postmodern moral relativism.
Oh dear.




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Oh goody!
The gift that keeps on giving!
Ok, I’ll bite: what the hell does a doctoral student in classics know about postmodernism?
What?!!!!!!! Christine is related to Anikin? and Luke? Should the Masturbators now fear the Ewok hordes? (Ouch! I bet those logs smart a bit.) Does Oxford offer doctorates in Star Wars trivia. Will tea baggers now start attending gatherings in full storm trooper regalia? Can the death star now be defined as “the philosophical morass of post-modern moral relativism?” Is Yoda really Jesus? Is Delaware really Tatooine? Wow. That would mean Ron Paul is Han Solo and Sharon Angle is Chewbacca.
It’s no use, he sees her
He starts to shake and cough
Just like the old man in
That book by Nabakov
Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me
Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me
Don’t stand, don’t stand so close to me
OK OK OK miss Naughty Spices wiki page is the very definition of postmodern moral relativism. But what the hell do you expect from Chrissy the Pooh when the highpoint of her daddys life was being Bozo the Clown
MEANWHILE Old Spice in Nevada and Rand Squared in Kintucky and Groin Spice in Conneticut and Guvonor Pornbreath in New Yawk are lookin mmmmm Normal in comparison. HAHAHAHA itz workin perfectly!!!
This was my second summer with the Phoenix Institute. The Phoenix Institute was a group of Jedi academics; rebels and renegades against the evil empire of politically correct university life. Their summer school at Oxford ran three weeks, and was intended to give intellectual alternatives to the philosophical morass of postmodern moral relativism.
And a chance for me to get laid, seeing as my significant other was in a summer program in South America, or was that hiking the Appalachian Trail? I don’t remember, it was so long ago. And I’ve moved on. To latex.
…the equivalent of a course in the humanities at any graduate school at any university…
…three weeks…
A proud graduate of Any U.
I think we may now know what ODonnell was eating on that satanic altar. Meatballs!
I found the image of O’Donnell in my toast this morning. Can I sell it on eBay for hundreds of thousands of dollars?
…were you playing with your toast?
Ah, the old “Buttering my Toast” ploy!
Seriously, I like me some Star Wars, but that is something that…requires some moments, where there is silence and a soft mellow background? And quite possibly some arm restraints? Can we see some Fenway now? Please? These people are frightening.
a 50-pound barrel of Haribo Gummi Bears at
CostCoMallWart FIFY (since we all know Costco is somewhat more eeevil librul)O’Donnell
because I’m Italian, I love meatballs.
wow, are Larry Craig, Bishop Long, Ted Haggard and Charlie Crist Italian too?
I’m guessing here:
Nothing.
If Satan is going to start filling out fake LinkedIn profiles the exorcism squads better get their tech game up quick. Maybe the Vatican could start a hacker unit. Cardinalrines!!
Are you sure we’re not being punked? Middle Earth, Jedis, witchcraft, no masturbation, no sex, mice with human brains, telling the truth to Nazis… I remember this woman from Politically Incorrect, and she’s always been hilariously dumb, but good lord, the mother lode keeps delivering!
White bread, right?
…intellectual alternatives to the philosophical morass of postmodern moral relativism.
For all values of “intellectual” where “moral relativism” = the willing belief of conservatives in things that are proven to be untrue.
I think the relative value of being a Beck University graduate versus being a Jedi University graduate is the kind of argument that’s usually acted out using little plastic figurines, along with lots of “kscccheww” and “bwwooshh” sounds.
I can’t believe TBogg has left this on the table:
Dr. Cockshut?!?!?
“Ok, I’ll bite: what the hell does a doctoral student in classics know about postmodernism?”
Just exactly as much as a ‘Romanist’ with a degree in Classics does about military research history. The world of academia (and its attendants) is a wondrous one.
Yes, I am bitter. I think I need to go back and look at Wembley nomming Fenway’s ear.
I have a campaign song recommendation…
Hey, hey–they say I better get a chaperone
Because I can’t stop messin’ with the danger zone
No, I won’t worry, and I won’t fret–
Ain’t no law against it yet–
Oop–she bop–she bop–
Next Summer’s Course:
2Tits/
FlagPinClownKid 2012!!1!1!!Her dad was Bozo? I wonder which one? Only because a former Bozo used to come into a restaurant I worked at in NYC from time to time. If that’s Pissy Chrissy’s dad, then a WHOLE lot is explained. This dude always seemed completely stoned, had a much younger faux trophy wife and both of them always sported plastic Bozo watches.
Yes really, so in addition to his still bozo-esque hairdo, you’d know his claim to fame. And be impressed after he invariably left you a crappy tip.
An anti-masturbation crusader attending a lecture by Dr. Cockshut! If that isn’t proof of synchronicity in the universe, I don’t know what is.
Heh. He’s actually a respected (if slightly fusty) scholar of Victorian novels. I remember a couple of his lectures from nearly 20 years back.
It’s a slightly grubby little secret, but Oxford and Cambridge during the summer are a bit National Lampoon’s Academic Vacation, with summer courses of varying degrees of respectability and legitimacy that allow dons to make some easy pickings from
gullible foreignersthe intellectually curious.You know what they say: Haribo macht Kinder froh!
“Oral exam at Oxford’s Jedi campus”
Who knew the Brits had such interesting, ummm, exams.
The requirement is that to pass them, the examiners must be thoroughly satisfied. :-)
“O’Donnell is also described in a ZoomInfo entry as having achieved a ‘certificate’ in ‘Post Modernism in the New Millennium.’”
I would be so thrilled to have a “Certificate in Post Modernism” to hang on the fabric side of my cubicle. Everyone would be do jealous–and puzzled.
A wonderful explanation of how O’Donnell can be so educated AND so stupid at the same time.
Hm. Can’t find any confirmation that Daniel O’Donnell was (presumably Philadelphia’s) Bozo in the Wikipedia article on Bozo. On the other hand, they don’t mention Jerry Harrell (aka “Dr. Madblood”) either, and I even have a book that says he was Richmond’s Bozo on WTVR into the 70s.
Still, wouldn’t it just be so sad if she’s making that one up? A very weak cry for help, if so. I’m willing to go along with the notion that Wikipedia isn’t perfect, because see above.