In an attempt to get a handle on what exactly the good common sense salt-of-the-earth Real Americans of flyover country think about the America-hating homosexual communists in the Mainstream Media, CBS sat down with anger bear Andrew Breitbart who operates a ramshackle race baiting shack in rustic, yet quaint, Brentwood:
Conservative publisher Andrew Brietbart sat down for an extensive interview with CBSNews.com Friday in which he discussed his disdain for the mainstream media, offered his perspective on the Republican presidential field, said President Obama should have released a post-mortem photo of Osama bin Laden, and complained that men have been turned into eunuchs by political correctness.
Before we get to the eunuchs (they’ll wait… what else have they got to do?) let’s talk about those Republican nominees:
Breitbart said his dream 2012 Republican presidential ticket includes two African-Americans, Herman Cain and Allen West, suggesting they would draw out those who “believe everybody that disagrees with the Democratic Party is a racist.”
He said Tea Party crowds in the South are extremely supportive when such an “authentic” ticket is brought up.
“That ticket would blow up the death star of political correctness that the left uses against the right,” he said.
Because there is nothing Tea Party Republicans love more than “the blacks“. And, besides, what better way to beat a colored Democratic President than with a Republican ticket that is even more colored-er, regardless of how often David Axelrod makes Joe Biden dress up like Flavor Flav.
But what about those “smooth as a Ken doll” American men (obviously not including Lindsey Graham who is literally hung like a gay bull. Seriously. Just ask Joe Lieberman):
The “Big Government” publisher also said the Tea Party is “run by women.”
“Because their husbands are afraid, they’re eunuchs,” he said. “They’re afraid of being called a racist, they’re afraid of being accused of sexual harassment in the workplace for even looking the wrong way, they live in a politically correct world where they’ve been turned into eunuchs.”
That’s right. Out of necessity the Tea Party is being run by ladies in mom-jeans and be-sequined American flag sweatshirts because their husbands haven’t been worth jackshit since they told that joke about the coloreds at the Teambuilding Tuesday luncheon and then got fired by that lady in HR who is probably a total man-hating dyke. Bitch. Now all the jobs are being done by Indians (the ones in Bangalore, not the ones who own all the casinos) and Mr. Fuck’em, I’ll Get Rich Blogging About Kenyan Muslims, LOL! spends his days working on his Button Gwinett costume (Butterick pattern B1776) while the missus is out doing the grunt work of shaking a misspelled sign at motorists, because, you know….. universal health care, NPR, brown people, and slutty teens who use abortion for birth control.
These people will save America.





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It’s too bad the Repub colour isn’t blue. ‘Cause if they run two blacks on the top of the ticket the teabaggers’ heads would explode and then it would be a really patriotic scene all red, white and blue.
As it is with their colour being red, there is the risk they might be mistaken for Canadians.
I think the Repub version of that is
The “Big Government” publisher also said the Tea Party is “run by women.”
Well, I know I for one cannot resist the feminine wiles of Dick Armey and David Koch, so perhaps he has a point.
Wait what?
No Andrew, people don’t think everyone on the right is racist, they think you are. And the teabillies, or most of them.
Yes, that makes sense, the part about how all those tea bag party men carrying racist signs are afraid of being called racists, because if your fear in life is being seen as a racist, under a sign like that is the last place people would look. Clever, really.
No racism at all when it comes to Herman “No Muslims working in my gov’t.” Cain & Allen “BANG! Psych, haji!!” West. That’s good old religious bigotry.
After all, the only racism left is accusing white racists of being racists.
I’m just glad to see that people haven’t forgotten the classics, and that homage is paid where due: “I was sad because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no cock.” —Michael O’Donoghue [National Lampoon Encyclopedia of Humor, page 91]
And I’m glad I looked it up, because I was thinking it was an Ed Bluestone line. He has some good lines in there too but I’m already up too late.
I’ve seen the Cain/West vision of color-blind Repiglicanism before when it was called Alan Keyes, and he got about 6 votes.
There won’t be many more this time around.
Cain will find out in about 10 minutes what the Repiglican enthusiasm for his campaign is really all about, and that’s less time than it takes to bake a pizza.
Why?
What on earth makes CBS, or anyone, think Breitbart knows what the average “saltoftheearth” midwesterner teabagggin’ type thinks or believes?
Have they really not twigged to the fact that the man is a compulsive liar? (giving him the benefit of the doubt).
I can see how the whole PC thing causes Republicans to fret. Especially TP’ers. Because without exception they are all Rod Farva.
For the bunch of lefties I work with – it’s just a challenge we can’t resist. If there were no limits you could just come out and say any moronic hateful sh*yt to anyone anytime.
e.g., “Chickenf*cker!”, or variants thereof:
i) “Black Chickenf*cker!”;
y) “Liberal Chickenf*cker!”;
x) “Any other group we are told we shouldn’t like (and assuming we don’t know someone personally, who, it turns out, is actually OK) Chickenf*cker!”
What’s the fun in that?
So all that PC sh*t just hones our skills. Now we really got the skillz down to f*ck with coworkers, HR, Office of Compliance, “upper management”. And we do it purely for the entertainment value. Because most people in the workplace (except the few who do the actual work) are all drooling imbeciles, Republicans, Xtians etc. And without the PC challenge, they wouldn’t be worthy of our attention at all.
Seriously, it’s becoming an art form. And there are only two rules:
1) If it is funny enough, you can get away with anything.
2) I forget, because I have been drinking. Possibly. (I mean, that’s possibly the reason; I certainly have been drinking).
C) Something similar to #1. I will remember it in a minute.
and another rule is: those f*ckin authoritarians cannot begin to comprehend what you just said anyway. So just keep on tweaking them as you go.
And rule (? some number from #section A.4) p2(maybe?): The only thing that counts is how you tell it after you get out.
*I think I have found out why they are called “Upper” management. Because that’s one of the ways they piss away the f*in wages you are working hard for. They just don’t have to piss it into a cup like you do.
Disclaimer: In the honored tradition that only Ni**ers can tell Ni**er jokes, and only J*ws can tell J*w jokes, etc., I should probably disclose that to all external appearances I’m kinda upper management too. I guess I just got better drugs or something?
Thanks for listening.
Aargh. “rule (? some number from #section A.4) p2(maybe?)” is not correct. I was going to look it up first, I think. Or its a typo.
By the way, I hate f*in typos. I will tell you why:
I used to have a really great dog. He’d run on the beach with me all day, fetch sticks, chase cats, poop on the neighbor’s lawn and all that good doggie-style stuff (is that right?).
And then just one little typo, and he’s working his own 1-900 Miracle Auction Newtork*. (I hate to say it, but it’s actually good value – way below wholesale, but you have to pay the S&H). Point is – no time for me any more, at least until he retires.
*Yes, I know. I also own a number of amphibians.
We don’t think everyone who disagrees with the Democratic Party is a racist. Hell, I disagree with the Democratic Party on lots of things. We just know you are, Andrew.
Asked to comment on what it says about the Republican Party that such a ticket will never happen, Breitbart changed the subject incredibly quickly.
Oh, who am I kidding? The reporter probably called him, asked one question and went to get a sandwich while Breitbart ranted for half an hour.
i can’t believe i just spent the last 10 minutes of a glorious sunny spring morning looking up button gwinett. darn you tbogg!
At the bottom of the linked CBS story I found this little gem:
(emphasis added)
So apparently not-so-Breit-Bart believes Marco Rubio to be either black or female. Hmmm …
Obama will release the photos as soon as Sarah Palin releases hers.
I know the answer to this already, so I’m sure I’ll look foolish for asking, but I suppose there’s no chance that he was asked about l’affair Sherrod, or that if he was, there was any pushback over the obvious and blatant, easy-to-disprove with print and videotape lies he told to cover his own ass, is there? Nah. Didn’t think so.
In other news, I’ve got the snuff pic Butthurt so desperately wants released right here.
Whoops! “everybody that disagrees with the Democratic Party is a racist.” Makes me a racist too.
No but he was asked about Sherrod a week ago on Bill Maher’s show by Laura Flanders, who also called him a con man straight up, all of which almost made up for the fact that Maher would have the con man on his panel to begin with.
My favorite part actually was when she nails Breitbart’s whole birther/schooler thing as an updated version of literacy tests and poll taxes from the pre-civil rights era, just to keep trying to find some way to delegitimize anyone who’s black.
Breitbart’s response to that by the way was almost the best part:
“What are you talking about, with Sarah Palin they asked “What newspapers do you read?”
To even get what he means you have to realize that to Palinistas, asking what newspapers she read wasn’t a zero-impact Parade Magazine-style personal interest question about her tastes by a famously softball TV host, but a fiendishly clever hardball gotcha question engineered to trip her up just like literacy tests for blacks had been, because in Palin’s case knowing the name of even one newspaper was obviously so far beyond her intellectual scope that they knew it would be her undoing.
Yeah, I saw him on Maher and was disgusted, in particular by Maher’s seeming objection to Flanders calling him out in stark terms & being oh-so-uncivil. That’s why jerkoffs like Butthurt dominate our media landscape – because even people who KNOW they’re jerkoffs give them megaphones for spreading their bullshit.
Chock-Full-o-Win
[Presses imaginary "Like" button ten times.]
Dear Andy: There are plenty of African-American douchebags. See Mikey Steele and Allen West. Two black Repug candidates wouldn’t fool anyone. And as the old saying goes, not all Republicans are racist, but all racists are Republican.
Nice pic of Breibart, (throwing my snuggie away now).
Kinda looks like a blue KKK robe. Guess he forgot the pointy hat.
Hey TBOGG, I sent Elliott an email today saying she had accumulated enough info against the librul media meme in here Sunday TH posts (6:1 wingnuts against standard Rs, like O admin, today for example) that she should write it up then market it to someone for a longer article or book research.
Really? Sounds like something a real woman-hater would say.
Just as a one-person unscientific experiment, I asked Mr.Solai if he ever fears being accused of sexual harassment. The response was “Why would I be accused of sexual harassment?” Guess he’s not a eunuch.
Don’t you just love “mansplaining“?
Well of course. When pigs fly and hell freezes over.
2 minutes to shutdown. G’nite everyone.
Are we still doing maintenance?
Doesn’t look like it. Weird time for maintenance, though.
Andrew Breitbart has an abusive personality. His war against “political correctness” is a war against forces in society that have decided verbal and emotional abuse doesn’t have to be tolerated.
“Political Correctness” is the GOP code word people with abusive personalities have for those in civil society who try to stem some of the more outrageous abuses.
Breitbart is too predictable and therefore BORING. I’m roughly his age and have had these “con vs. lib” arguments since high school. Yawwwwwwnnnnnnn.
First thing: Andrew Breitbart is mental. I mean that sincerely. Do you see the look in his eyes when anyone challenges him on anything? It’s almost frightening the way he flashes. I think he’d be very dangerous with a weapon because he has no control of his emotions.
Second thing: Those of us who actually do know black folks as actual friends, or who are black, or are rational thinkers in general, know that there are black asshats and idiots that deserve all of the ridicule they get. But it’s for a definable reason, with evidence, that would define anyone as an asshat or idiot without knowing what color they were. When it comes to politics, that criticism can take the form of “Your policies are insane and you sound as crazy as Rick Santorum”. But, for Breitbart and the teabaggers when criticising Obama, it takes the form of cartoons of watermelons on the front lawn of the White House, pictures of the black president as a baby chimp or a witch doctor and/or challenges to his very citizenship.
The fact that Breitbart thinks that running Herman Cain and Allen West would erase the racist reputation that he and baggers have so richly deserved is hilarious. He really, really doesn’t get it. Running a crazy person (West) is running a crazy person, period. Crazy is crazy and mean is mean and stupid is stupid. Is it racist to think that millions of black people will run out and vote for an Allen West because he’s black? Yeah, it is. Black people can figure out crazy, mean black people, too. Jeez!
“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours?”
I think it’s more an attitude of “What’s wrong with looking at a woman’s ass/tits if I pay her?”
Not important that the woman is professional and not dancing on a table….
I understand that we are out ahead of the standard Democrats (good, hardworking, honest people – but they fear way too much. They fear tarrarism, they fear standing out, they fear being criticized, they fear basically whatever the TV tells them to fear – but they do have common sense).
Why is it that Old-school Dems (as opposed to the Clinton/Obama neo-con crats) are afraid of fighting fire with fire? Michael Moore is considered by many to be too far left. To me, Moore seems moderate. He doesn’t advocate out and out socialism. He is reasonable and uses facts, logic and real truths. Why is it that Democrats refuse to fight fire with fire and utilize the same tactics of Breitbart?
I know it is in the “good nature” of real old-school Democrats to forgive and forget – but that motto has us always the patsy. We are always running to kick Lucy’s ball. We allow people to call Obama Liberal. Why is it that we (Americans in general) now measure our President by what he says, and not by what he actually does?
By by measure of what President Obama actually does, he is to the right of Richard M Nixon.
Let’s face it. The guy’s a genius. So are Glenn Beck, Sarah Palin, Anne Coulter and so many other celebrity performance artists. Lies, the more outrageous the better, have made them all wealthy and famous. The fact that anyone pays them any attention at all is a testament to just how deeply broken is our media and the current public discourse. They are the symptoms, not the disease.
I’m appreciative, but still somewhat ambivalent about the work that Media Matters does. Lies do need to be confronted, but the barrage is now so fast and furious, it’s like swatting individual mosquitoes in a fever swamp. Time to try to drain the swamp instead? Right now, the more oxygen that is spent on these gutter-dwellers, the more money they make and the more they like it. This never ending spew of nonsense and the requisite rebuttals help to bolster the ludicrous false equivalence and “he-said, she-said” narratives that are staples of our lazy, celebrity media.
Is it really useful to treat these people as if they were actual politicians, journalists, thinkers or public figures who deserve a reasoned response to each brain-fart? How about building a movement amongst the sane to ignore them to death? We could start with left-leaning media, and work towards the center.
Sure, responding to their incessant ranting generates delicious righteous indignation and web-site hits, but if we ever want things to get better we’ve got to get off the catnip. In fact the daily diet of “controversy” provides their sponsors a useful distraction from our devolution into a permanent corporate/war state (chronicled in these pages daily).
Patiently refuting their lies and debunking their demented theatrics sure hasn’t decreased the flow of crazy. As soon as one lie looses traction (birthers), a new one takes its place (GWB is responsible for the death of OBL, and torture works). Surely it’s time to figure out how to deal with the sources rather than the inexhaustible swarm of lies.
I really think that if enough bloggers, media pundits, politicians and reporters simply stopped responding to them or to questions related to their ravings, they would slowly lose their purchase in mass-market media
Imagine if responsible people simply refused to dignify the crazy on the Sunday chat shows, if they turned down the Liberal vs Batshit Crazy Birther interview segments. If there was no useful opponent to Breitbart available (thus no fireworks) would the segment go to air? Our sorry, lazy celebrity media needs a controversy. If all they had was a crazy man ranting by himself, followed by….crickets, it might help to get our media stars looking for other things to do.
It won’t be easy. It won’t be quick. But I would love to see a quiet, national movement of constructive disengagement from the crazy, one adult at a time. The nutbars have received unjustified attention for too long.
It’s shameful that such a smear monger like Breitbart is so frequently given a platform by the “mainstream media” he claims to hate. Credibility ain’t worth shit.
Exactly right. They resent being censured (not to be confused with censored) for their bigotry, even though it is simply no-nonsense expressions of their warped perceptions of reality.
Those stupid racist tea baggers need to be P.C. correct. Progressives are hilarious.
Or, in more high-falutin’ English philosopher language: