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Continuing with our Oh, You Guys Are Soooo Mature weekend, we will go ahead and post the Marcus Bachmann “Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better” corn dog bob. (h/t watertiger)
For obvious reasons this should put to rest any rumors that Marcus is gay (Jon Stewart : “He’s so gay he calls ‘Top Gun’ ‘that volleyball movie.’”) as his technique leaves much to be desired.
On the other hand, my apologies to all of you who were planning on watching the History Channel’s Mysteries Of The Evangelical Mohel Exposed! on Sunday night.
This is kind of a spoiler…
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To continue with the prescribed juvenalia theme:
Photo above: Marcus Bachmann produces worlds largest booger.
Photo below: Michelle Bachmann consumes it.
Oh my fucking God… for a moment there it totally looked like Boris Yeltsin showing us how he would’ve dealt with the Taliban.
It’s a tough one, but I’m sure a crack squad of Democratic strategists are right now working hard to come up with a plan that’ll fuck up the screaming advantage even a grade A fucknozzle like Obama will have over this dynamic duo of dong devouring wingnuts. Michelle hasn’t yet blessed us with her choice of VP candidate, but assuming it’s someone like Christine O’Donnell (please, God, please, I promise I’ll stop taking your name in vain) all Obama really needs to do to win is to avoid raping any goats or children, and at all costs avoid listening to his close advisers.
Marcus looks like he’s trying to pray away the corn dog.
Um… why is she trying to shove the corndog into his
nosemouth? Can’t he hold it and eat it himself?I think it just shows that they have a longstanding understanding that there are things that Marcus* doesn’t do in front of Michele. As the previous photo also showed with regards to Michele.
*Weirdest thing. Just as I typed that name, the character on Hercule Poirot said it. Doodoo doodoo
You know you’re full of shit when you start squeezing foot long growlers out of your nose.
Speaking of Yeltsin, where the hell are the Bachmannski’s flag pins?
I think Marcus reflexively clamps his eyes shut when there’s a wiener in his mouth because he knows the teabaggin’ next!
Woof! All we need now is one of Caribou Barbie chompin’ on the corn-fed foot-long, and I’m in Bachmann Palin Overdrive!
Ya know, with all the Midwestern manliness/womanliness/frontierman-womanliness and Injun-killin’ I gots me a hankerin’ for leather.
Not that soft, supple modern leather either, but back-country rawhide.
Rowwwwr
Oh Marcus, you beautiful, beautiful man.
Speaking of juvenilia, the word is out that JuiceBox Jesus is, erm, not all that: http://www.sportsgrid.com/nfl/tim-tebow-run-video-cowboys/
Oh, poor Michelle, she really has no idea that her husband is gay. Look at her face, expecting him to be happy with this photo opp. He is thinking, oh I have to be careful, this won’t look good and ends up using a small bite with teeth, instead of a big gulp. That makes him look like he doesn’t have cock experience and it makes men withdraw from the too much teeth/bite effect.
He sure looks… um… dainty… in refusing not to deep throat a corn dog.
And to those who accuse us of juvenalia, I ask, “I know what you are but what am I?” No further questions, your honor.
Marcus knows what happens when you nibble a cream-filled long john.
And jeez TBogg, what’s with this “continuing” horseshit? We’ve been on our best behavior.
Why is she always holding a pen (a Sharpie?) in her hand? Is that symbolic of something? Or is it just the stiff rod shape that comforts her?
Two words: Bob Dole
If we’re lucky, she’ll OD on Botox and paralyze her mouth.
I’m so confused: was Michelle of the Bells voted the least offensive retarded circus clown or the most amusing retarded circus clown?
Oh, Jeebus, it looks like it’s time to pray-the-gay-away from Marcus. If he’s not trying to look like he’s never seen cock before, I’m from Mars.
You know, if they dyed those things green or something… anything but that tumescent maroon. I’ve never had one, so have no idea if it’s worth endangering one’s political future just for the juicy taste-treat delight, damn the photogs and full speed ahead. Though it’s hard to envision Bachmann blossoming out in DFH hedonism like that.
Either way, it’s a win. With poor Pawlenty throwing in the towel, maybe he can be her VP…
I’ll say this for Marcus – what he lacks in technique he more than makes up for in enthusiasm.
Well, I’ll be dipped in shit and rolled in breadcrumbs*, you’re right! Word has it that Luke Russert caught Marcus gasping “aw” behind The Fair’s Cornhole Tent after the votes rolled in….
*T-Paw’s Straw Poll motto to show he’s a good ol’ boy
Speaking of Marcus’s technique, I would call it ‘Not Safe for Dirk’.