Many conservative bloggers went to sleep last night all butthurty and sad because Mitt Romney’s minions (Mittiots by proxy) would not take their phone calls during the Official “Newt Gingrich’s mama is soooo fat…” conference call.

Matt Lewis of Tucker Carlson’s toy newspaper explains:

As you probably heard, some Mitt Romney surrogates hosted a conference call today to attack Newt Gingrich. Because Romney is attempting to win a Republican primary — and cast Newt Gingrich as unacceptable to conservatives — you probably assume that center-right journalists or conservative bloggers got to ask some questions, right?

Wrong. Here’s the list of reporters and media outlets who were permitted to ask questions:

JOHN DICKERSON, CBS NEWS
MARK HALPERIN, TIME
LLOYD GROVE, THE DAILY BEAST
EVAN MCMORRIS-SANTORO, TPM
DAVID CORN, MOTHER JONES
PHIL RUCKER, WASHINGTON POST

That’s it. No Townhall.com, HotAir, Daily Caller, Washington Examiner, National Review, Weekly Standard, American Spectator, or Washington Times … you get the picture.

And it’s not as though they limited it to august, mainstream publications. I mean, they took a question from Talking Points Memo

Well, yes, Talking Points Memo did win a George Polk award whereas Mark Halperin got his job because he is Morton Halperin’s moron son and, oh yeah, Mark once called President Obama a “dick’ on the air, so it did kind of even itself out, august-wise.

After Lewis published his whiny I’m-not-mad-I’m-just-disappointed column, the Romney campaign responded by pointing out that the conservative bloggers are dull-witted and uncoordinated, kind of like that person you see on Jeopardy who is always violently throttling and pushing on their buzzer to no avail while the guy with all the money is already saying “What is Madonna’s vagina” or something like that. Lewis adds:

Romney spox Ryan Williams sends along this statement, which I post without comment:

Tonight (as we do with every call) we sent out a media advisory to our regular press list inviting members of the media to join the call. We use a phone conferencing system to manage these calls.

Participants who join the call are then invited to ask a question after the opening comments by pressing “1” on their phones. Question are fielded on a first come, first serve basis. We do not screen out any media organization. Whoever notifies the operator by pressing ”1” first gets to ask their question first.

On tonight’s call we answered every single question in the queue. Every reporter – conservative, liberal or nonpartisan – who wanted to ask a question got to ask one. Organizations that were not called on either didn’t press the number “1” or never joined the call in the first place.

I keep telling you guys…. if they ever develop opposable thumbs, they could be a force to be reckoned with.

Also, they  hate Romney even more now.