OMG! An INCONSISTENCY!

To the (Breit) Bart Cave!

Proof positive that David Ayers wrote the book, that Obama is a poopyhead and the whole 2008 election is scratched and McCain Palin wins.

True stories about strapping young black bucks plowing our innocent virtuous white wimmen.

Wha? You mean the sherriffs a nih?

Wha? You mean the sherriffs a nih?

Please!,We call them blahs now.

That’s virtuous furrin women – please. Oz is just a state of mind, after all.

composite of white women

?

I have a composite pile in my back yard but it has grass clippings, leaves, some organic garbage..but white women? What kind of President do we have?

Sheesh, at least back at the Dexter Club they asked first.

Okay scratch, maybe I had the wrong 70s movie reference – was one of them named Abby?

Mmmmmmm…..Pudding…

How can you have any pudding if you don’t beat your meat?

You start out in 1954 saying nih, nih nih. By 1968 you can’t say nih anymore, it hurts you, so you transfer over to blah and even less relevant words like forced busing and states rights, but thse economic things still hurt the blahs more than the whites

“and pudding…”

There’s pudding every day…treacle…

Lesseee…Obama did it with a white girl.

The bigots and assholes don’t like it.

Therefore, he belongs on Mount Rushmore…or, at least, we’re not supposed to talk about how he squandered an historic election and did rehab on the republican party, and is quacking and waddling into the November election like it was his 8th year instead of his 4th…

Oh, and of course Bush and the Republicans never, ever tried to exploit actual military successes for political gain — they just tried to pretend they had military successes and then tried to exploit those.

…and by this time you’re getting so abstract now that you’re talking about cutting taxes and not needing even to say “nih” even though everyone knows that’s what you’re really talking about.

Lee Atwater, translated for modern times.

For the love of Chuy, can you not give it a rest? Ever?

I’m beginning to think tanbark’s a bot.

Aggghhhh! You’re right! We’re all disappointed and aggrieved. So, your work here is done. The Obots of Sadly, No await your wisdom.

Well, he/she/it seems to think we are, which raises interesting Turing test questions, such as: If a computational device cannot distinguish between another computational device and a human, who let the dogs out? And is it Thursday yet?

I thought it was Obama who let the dogs out… and then – cue the dastardly-sounding music – ATE THEM … while still ALIVE!!111!!!!11

Woof woof woof woof….

Ergo, I *blame Obama.* bow WOW

Oy vey: Bobo being Bobo. Lordy! Here’s something to amuse you, and your eyes will remain in tact in your head.

All tanbark and no tanbite.

I confess, as a Giants fan [baseball, natch], that I was thinking of years past; I went looking for video and found (to my amazement) Joan Walsh. However, the search also led me to this magnificent list of The 20 Most Annoying Songs. (Hey I like one of them!) And now back to my regularly scheduled work.

I saw Dan Wilson perform solo a couple years ago and hilariously introduced “Closing Time” by saying it was about the birth of his child.

I love that song.

ha ha… I must be getting old. I confess to being unfamiliar with – gasp shudder – quite a few of those songs on that “worst” list. I do know some and am inclined to agree.

If I came up with a “worst” list, it would go back in time and have to include Muscrat Love.

Some people never cease trying to make a point by using the truth against people with whom they have politial differences. /s

As Obama said at the WHCD, “It’s a boy eat dog world”.

Worst thing in the world happened to ME the other day. As I got to work, the song playing on the radio was “Silly Love Songs”. Haqve you EVER gone through the whole day with THAT playing over and over and over agin in your head. Would be a great addition to our “enhanced interrogation techniques” AND not prohibited by the Geneva Conventions.

My fellow Americans, we’ve travelled through more than a decade under the dark cloud of war. Yet here, in the pre-dawn darkness of Afghanistan, we can see the light of a new day on the horizon.

Can you say, “light at the end of the tunnel”? William Westmoreland could, right before the Tet Offensive.

I don’t recall you being such a whiny little fuck at The General’s place back-in-the-day….

What, no Kokomo? I had to crash at a friend’s house when that song was big and he played it on a loop, trying to drive me out.

At least I laughed at #20 when I first heard it on the radio.

Well, there’s definitely a certain demographic voting there. I have a soft spot for Chumbawumba’s politics though over-exposure will make almost anything annoying. And that Top 5 is stellar: My Humps / Macarena / Dogs / My Heart Will Go On And On And On / and, at #5 (where’s the bullet?), a special shout-out to our host with Photograph by … Nickelback!

Personal nominee: Bits and Pieces by the Dave Clark Five. Worst drum solo ever. (I suppose you have to call it a drum solo.) Top Ten hit in early 1964. Thump thump thump. I blame Ann Dunham.

Gee, I’m sorry, Guns…

every time I go down to the drugstore to get hosed for some medicine I need, I think about Obama’s telling Reid to kill the Dorgan amendment that would have allowed for re-importing cheap generic drugs, and something just comes over me. :o)

Especially when Tbogg puts up yet another hard-hitting, totally relevant piece about Ann Romney’s walk-in shoe closet, or about some crazy SOB of a right-winger who’s so extreme he scares “moderate” republicans.

I think it has something to do with the smell of rotten fish being dragged across Obama’s drone-trail, or that 24 hour media shelf-life for the story of our soldier who “liberated” 17 innocent Afghan men, women, and children.

I’m sure Tbogg was going to go all out on that, and just couldn’t find the time with his busy threading about just what a bunch of loons are the republicans on whom Obama has done such miraculous rehab.

Snark aside; the guy is busting tail at covering Obama’s ass, by shrieking about how vile are the republicans. I think someone needs to goose him a little bit. I apologize if it upsets you. :o)

Best ever movie line Tbogg. I think we are a generation behind!!

Come on, guys.

You could just ignore me.

I mean, if you don’t like hearing about Obama’s droning along nicely and enhancing the clusterfuck in Afghanistan in ways that would make George Bush blush, and if you’re more interested in dog-piling on some snake-handler conservative than you are in putting a liiiiittle pressure on Obama, you can always check out the Kardashian women; they’re a lively crew. :o)

Or, you can do that Hare Krishna type thingy where you mindlessly chant “WE SUCK LESS!” for hours, at the local airport. It worked beautifully at the mid-terms.

Bits And Pieces is horrid, but it serves the purpose of making me appreciate a good drummer when I hear one. There’s exactly one DC5 song I can stand, and that ain’t it.

A woman at the place I worked asked me if I knew the Macarena when I’d never even heard the song. I honestly didn’t even know what she was talking about. She teed it up on her CD player and proceeded to show me the dance. I was profoundly underwhelmed with both song and dance, and I’d lived through numerous bad dance crazes, the first I remember may have been the Jerk or the Watusi. Maybe even the Swim.

I am proud to say I have never heard a Nickelback song in full.

Or, instead of ignoring you, you could take your tired act to RedState or, better yet, I could just start deleting your comments because, honestly and truly, you have nothing to offer but your self-absorbed bitterness.

I didn’t actually check out the list. Please tell me Bobby Goldsboro’s “Honey” is on it.

Apparently tanbark has never heard of this somewhat popular thing called humor.

Never wasted a moment of his life in mere LAUGHTER!

No, it apparently aged out like so many other bad songs of our youth. I don’t know whether to be proud or depressed that our youth have carved entirely new avenues of musical crap.

That said, Goldsboro should get some sort of life achievement award for dreck.

Actually, years back at Jesus General tanbark had both relevant and humorous comments. Thus my comment @28 above.

My, my. Someone has really got a little thing going for Ann RMoney’s mythical walk-in shoe closets. Foot fetishist I’m thinking? Hmmmmm?

Say something once, why say it again?

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm — shoe closets……………

Five bucks says tanbark tries to crash the Book Salon and accuses Tracie McMillan of being a sellout because she worked at Wal-Mart.

every time I go down to the drugstore to get hosed for some medicine I need

I think we’ve uncovered the problem. tanbark has been cutting back on his meds and he’s suffering from imperforate negatonia — a condition that blinds one to any positive quality exhibited by another human. This affliction is predominately found in friendless old men.

“She’ll be calling WIIIIIIIIIIIILDfire …”

OK, t’weren’t Bobbeh, but they ran in the same circles in my head on AM radio of yore …

Meanwhile:

“He was trying to find his place in the whirl of humanity, while at the same time refining the literary riffs that filled up page after page of his journals.”

I guess it beats dodging the draft, being a drunken frat boy, or a job-killing rich white guy.

No 9/11′s and one dead Osama bin Laden under Barack Obama.

This is obviously good news for John McCain.

…and if you’re more interested in dog-piling on some snake-handler conservative than you are in putting a liiiiittle pressure on Obama,

Yeah TBogg, it’s not like Obama isn’t busy enough with God-bothering snake-handlers screaming “Scary Muslim!”, Multi-billionaires dropping 7 figure donations into “Obama’s coming for your guns America!!!”, and Congressional leaders more than eager to crash the economy to deny Obama a second term.

WHY THE FUCK AREN’T YOU HARPING ON HIM ABOUT KILLING TERRORISTS WITH DRONES?!?

It’s funny, I’m in China visiting family and I can go to Tbogg with no problem but not your link for songs. Can’t et any youtubes either.

Wasn’t his girlfriend killed in a kiln explosion?

I can see why the Chinese authorities would not want potentially scurrilous videos, but I clearly recall seeing #16 below on MTV in my cheapo Beijing hotel back in late ’93. Jann Wenner must be tickled pink to learn that they think Rolling Stone is somehow … subversive. I guess it has Taibbi. Anyway, for the permanent rotation from heck, as voted in 2007, these are they:

1. Black Eyed Peas, “My Humps”
2. Los Del Rio, “Macarena”
3. Baha Men, “Who Let The Dogs Out”
4. Celine Dion, “My Heart Will Go On”
5. Nickelback, “Photograph”
6. Lou Bega, “Mambo No. 5″
7. James Blunt, “You’re Beautiful”
8. Spice Girls, “Wannabe”
9. Sisqo, “The Thong Song”
10. Cher, “Believe”
11. Aqua, “Barbie Girl”
12. Chumbawumba, “Tub Thumper”
13. Rednex, “Cotton-Eyed Joe”
14. Eiffel 65, “Blue”
15. Crash Test Dummies, “Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm”
16. Meatloaf, “I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)”
17. ‘NSYNC, “Bye, Bye, Bye”
18. Ricky Martin, “Livin’ La Vida Loca”
19. Semisonic, “Closing Time”
20. Wham!, “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go”

Willis Alan Ramsey’s version of his own song is way better, much less ridiculous than Capt&Tennille’s popular version.

That entire album (WAR’s only one) is a classic. “Ballad of Spider John” is absolutely gorgeous and “Muskrat Candlelight” is performed with equal amounts of sweetness and humor, not sappy and cloying at all. Ramsey is one of those rare artists that told the record industry to go fuck itself. He now lives in Loveland, CO (last I read) and continues to perform.

President Obamas white half did it with a white gurl. Problem sloved.

Any bad song list that does not include The Pina Colada Song, You Light Up My Life, Afternoon Delight, Shakedown Cruise, Run, Joey and every song ever performed by Creed and Nickelback is not worthy of the title “bad song list.”

Obama dated a white woman? Let the vettering begin!!

And tanbark, you can piss off, m’kay?

You beat me to listing Afternoon Delight. That’s probably #2 on my list after Muscrat Love.

I confess to being some kind of a fogey & being totally clueless about Nickleback, which sounds like it’s a good thing.

My roommate watched a re-run of SNL recently with a band called “One Direction” on it. They seemed particularly craptastic and without one redeeming feature that I could see.

Eh? Not sure if I want to thank you for introducing me to that version. I guess it’s “better” than Captain & Tennille, but I can do without it. Not to my taste.

The whole “deal” with Obummer & teh wimminz vis some doltish crudely bigoted & clearly unhinged segment of conservatives is that they wish with all their little black hearts to prove that Obummer is teh gheyz. They seem a bit less concerned, amazingly enough, if he dated or had sexytime with white women. I guess if it were true that he is teh gheyz (or had a gay affair sometime), it could be combined with Obummer’s lack of long-form birth certificate to render him “not qualified” to be POTUS, and well, you know, like 2 days before the end of big O’s first term, he can be *impeached*!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!

Conservatives’ intense obsession with Barry’s sexytime-life, particularly before his marriage to Michelle can be something to behold.

Don’t know about anyone else, but I don’t recall other POTUS’s past “dating life” being put under the microscope except for Big Dawg Clinton. At least with Clinton, there was some “there” there. But who gives a fig who the POTUS “dated” when he was in high school or college?

The seething obsession of conservatives with Barry’s deep dark “past” can be something to behold if one can steel oneself to get outta the boat and go look at the mangoes.

Frankly: weird.

I still like turning to my (now-)wife with a cucumber and saying “Mine’s bigger”. I just know that eventually she’ll stop punching me when I do that.

I don’t recall other POTUS’s past “dating life” being put under the microscope

Some awesome stuff about G Dub’s dating extravaganzas here: Family of Secrets

Too bad it wasn’t out there pre-2000 cuz he was a fuckin’ douchebag (big surprise, eh?)….

I’ll have to check it out later. Can you give a hint what the “extravaganzas” were about?

No matter what, though, conservatives would’ve found some way to “forgive” or ignore whatever it is that W did bc, as you well know: IOKIYAR.

W was a fuckin’ douchebag? You are being kind, very very kind. Just MHO, of course!

Oh, you know, the standard “I can’t live without you” to get some late night action and then the standard “Do I know you?” in public a few days later type of douchebaggery extravaganzas….

Well, Wilson Pickett’s earlier Run Joey, Run (similar story, totally different song) was amusing in that it wasn’t morbid and he was pretty much laughing at Joey’s plight while telling him to get the hell out of Dodge. I tell people I like the song without telling them which one I mean (not that most even heard Pickett’s song).

Ah, Afternoon Delight. The song about sex that kills desire dead.

Petesh (thanks for the nightmare thread hijack): Where on the list is Terry Jacks’s Seasons in the Sun?

Billy Don’t Be A Hero
MacArthur Park

I’m not even going to look for a link for those; don’t want to contaminate my browser history.

I think the President’s relations with the white girl were innocent. She just needed help busting up her chifforobe.