Providing that arena security at the 2012 Republican National Convention in Tampa does their job and keeps past-her-freshness-date grandma Sarah Palin from bum rushing the stage during prime time and rhythmically humping the podium to the primal beat of Warrant’s Cherry Pie before she can be subdued with a grizzly tranquilizer dart, Mitt “Mitt” Romney should be the Republican nominee in November.

He bought it, he owns it.

With imminent (primary, not general) victory in mind, Mitt is speed dating  conservative bloggers who are only now coming to realize that it’s last call, 1:45AM and it’s either Mitt or get the fuck out and go home alone to sadly masturbate to an old Reagan photo. Not that they won’t do both…

So Wednesday afternoon Mitt & his lovely yet humble hausfrau wife OfMitt met with a group of conservative movers & fakers in an effort to build bridges/mend fences/work out the kinks/calm the waters/pave the road/and dirty the Sanchez because Mitt needs their love/Like a desert needs rain/Like a town needs a name/Like Larry Kudlow needs cocaine.

To use a cooking expression: Team Mitt is Folding In The Nuts.

In an effort to reach out to conservative media, presumptive Republican nominee Mitt Romney and wife Ann met for two hours Wednesday with several dozen conservative bloggers, reporters and columnists in an off-the-record gathering at a private Washington, D.C., club, according to attendees.

Romney, who struggled with some members of the conservative media during the Republican primary, is banking on their support in his campaign against President Barack Obama, regardless of whether they were previously in his corner or not.

The attendees came from numerous conservative sites and right-of-center publications, including National Review, Daily Caller, American Spectator, Washington Examiner, Right Wing News, Powerline, Townhall, Ace of Spades, Rhiel World View, White House Dossier [?], and Pajamas Media. RNC chairman Reince Preibus also attended.

Noticeably absent (possibly attending, but not listed) are any of the principals from Andrew Breitbart’s Crypt O’ Neocons or Erick 1000xErick Erickson from Red State. Presumably Erick (who is “not all that” according to Gay Turtle Mitch McConnell) is going to need some private face time with Mitt since he’s always had a hankering for Guns & Bible Beiber manmeat before bowing to the inevitability of death by a thousand RINO’s.

As for the Breitards, their job just got a little easier:

Some conservative journalists left satisfied with what they heard. At one point, Romney told attendees that the campaign intended to work closely with their outlets and will even help conservative outlets writing about Obama with opposition research, according to an attendee.

This should help them #vettheprez since it hasn’t gone so well since they showed Obama black-hugging a black man which is all that Big Daddy Breitbart left them in his will before Jesus called him home. Or reincarnated him as poor black baby whose mother is being evicted and there is no organization like ACORN around to help her out.

Because Jesus is funny that way…