For the next few weeks you can expect a series of Politico pieces, based upon highly orchestrated leaks from “insiders” on the Romney campaign, trial ballooning various candidates to fill the coveted Romney/(Your name here) 2012 slot. The idea is to let Politico ‘get the name out there’, let the lamestream media take their best shot at the potential candidate and the Romney campaign can sit back and watch the base play Marry, Fuck, or Kill?
Today they are watching the applause meter while holding their hand over the mulleted head of human snooze button Tim Pawlenty; a candidate so bland he makes Mitt Romney look like a Kenyan socialist Muslim lesbian:
Tim Pawlenty has jumped to the top of the vice presidential shortlist of several Mitt Romney advisers after emerging as the most effective — and well-liked — surrogate for the GOP nominee-to-be, according to several Republicans familiar with campaign deliberations.
The former Minnesota governor has impressed top Romney officials with his winning onstage presence at a grueling roster of Republican events throughout the country and with his low-maintenance personal style that has made him a favorite with the campaign’s tight-knit inner circle at the Boston headquarters.
For the record, much like “strapping young buck”, this is the first time in the history of the universe that the expression “winning onstage presence” has ever been used in conjunction with Tim Pawlenty.
In contrast to some of their higher-maintenance surrogates, the plain-spoken Pawlenty travels with no entourage — not even the “body guy” that even most House members travel with. Often, a Romney campaign volunteer meets him when his plane lands. But at an appearance for Romney in North Carolina recently, he rented his own car and drove himself to and from the airport. The local reporters were shocked when they followed him out to his car and watched him drive himself away.
When the campaign makes a request that he fly somewhere, according to a person familiar with the conversations, the former governor just says cheerfully: “Send me my ticket.”
Shorter Pawlenty: he’ll work hard for very little money based upon the delusional belief that one day the rich guy will notice him and reward him with untold riches. Also known as “typical Republican voter who struggles to get by and hates unions and the social safety net”.
Historical note: In 2008 Pawlenty came in sloppy second behind Sarah Palin when John McCain made his pick. Technically, Tim came in third since McCain really wanted Holy Joe Liberman … as if the burn of losing out to Palin wasn’t bad enough.





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What’s the male equivalent of being always the bridesmaid, never the bride? Pawlenty?
So, Pawlenty is a hit with “the campaign’s tight-knit inner circle,” which I’m sure is a strong reflection and cross-section of Americana, heh?
The Romney Toadies just LOVE this guy!
Maybe I’ll go to Wawa and order the Honkie Sub Sammich: A mayo and swiss on the whitest bread possible, please.
Now there’s a boring white fella that will get the Republican voter supercharged.
TeePee would be perfect. Mitt doesn’t want someone who will outshine him and you can’t get much duller than this.
Actually, Gov. Bridgefail has already cashed in. He’s the proud new spokes something or other for the fracking sand industry, making America a better place by diluting aquifers with health-affirming petroleum goodness.
Swiss? Orly? American cheese product isn’t good enough for Pawlenty and his fans? I would have pegged them as CheezWhiz kinda folks…
Kraft American, in those nice blocks of individual plastic pieces. Sometimes Pawlenty forgets to unwrap the slices so the sandwiches have a piquant crinkle when he eats them.
It’s an acquired taste.
TPaw would bring the singular honor to the Romney campaign in that NObody on that ticket would win any of their home states. MN is completely done with TPaw.
I still think TPaw is a strong conservative candidate as one of the few people whose commitment to low taxes has an actual body count.
Who let the bridge fall? Who? Who? Whoo?
Who let the bridge fall? Who? Who?
London Bridge is falling down & so is TPaw. First outta the gate & just the understudy. ‘Sides he appears furry curious …
Well, Romney would have to convert to Judaism to lose Utah.
This made me chortle in a most unseemly and schadenfreudelicious way…
I hear his name and always think of polenta, then I have to remind myself that I like polenta. That would be kind of a yummy ticket: Hominey & Polenta 2012: It’s What’s For Breakfast.
Hmm. That made me almost recollect a gaffe during the 2008 campaign, so I looked it up. Here’s the piece from Language Log:
They identify the speaker as Jo Ann Davidson, Co-Chairman of the Republican National Committee, at the Republican convention in St. Paul, 9/2/2008.
Well, isn’t TeePee not only a former Catholic but now one of those Talibangelical types who think Mormons ain’t Christian? (Mormonism is one of the more interesting heresies…) I’ll bet Utah might want to vet TeePee to see if he has the right kind of undies…
Are you sure it wasn’t an O’bama Drone strike?
A turkey sandwich, right?
Well, if Mitt’s looking for someone loathed in his home state like himself, TPaw’s yer man. Nothing says fail like losing to Michele Bachman in Iowa.
You go, TPaw!
Dammit! I’m pulling for Herman Cain!
Robot / Wild Man 2012!
Does he still date stamp and catalog the uneaten wrappers?
TPaw’s winning onstage presence really shone that fall day in 2008 when he had to bite his tongue and smile while he shared a stage with Sarah Palin. I thought the dude was going to cry like Darrell Issa for a moment there.
The whole reason Pawlenty pushed for the RNC to be held in Saint Paul was so he could accept what he fully expected to be John McCain’s selection of him to be McCain’s running mate. Instead, McCain blindsides everyone, especially Bridgefail, by letting his boner be his guide and going with the former beauty pageant contestant and longtime grifter.
By golly, that ring almost came off!
McCain/Palin would have never fucked up like Obummer…
They just spread a little corn oil and ‘corn sugar’ between Wonder Bred(tm) slices. It’s all-American.
Best one I’ve seen so far is Mitch Daniels. No longer remember where I picked it up. Accomplished in Indiana everything Walker hopes to do in Wisconsin, but without the drama & negative publicity.
Gov stint up this year. I have no idea what else he would bring to the ticket, like red meat to the values voter, geographical diversity, etc. Just thought it was an interesting idea.
Pawlenty is “low maintenance” – that’s hilarious. You don’t have to do much once the body is dead. It might be the dullest ticket ever.
I’m sure being the head of OMB for C+ Augustus will give him lots of street cred.
On edit:
Anything you want to find out about Mitch Daniels can be found here. http://doghouseriley.blogspot.com/ (The edit function really sucks…)
For those of you on this blog who are from Minnesota, couldn’t you just kringe at this news??? We lived under this fool for 8 years and I thought we finally got rid of him. Why doesn’t he get a job or something instead of living off the taxpayers !!! He was such a nothing but then again so is Romney so I can see the attraction.
Thanks for the ref, but until a veep is named I won’t spend a lot of effort on it. Remind me of the site if it does turn out to be Daniels.
Even though one would think that a running mate to attract others to you side would be preferable, his making it to the top is not surprising really.
The last thing TBTB IE Wall Street wants is any kind of a crusader. That is the main reason Palin was such a disastrous pick and why McCain loosing was not considered an event by them.
The more I read about the economy and the under the cover dealings on Wall Street, the more I am convinced that the person to occupy the WH wil be the one who is most willing to maintain the status quo and keep his/her big mouth shut and not blow the con. Some loose cannon or idealog is exactly what TPB do not want.
Doghouse Riley doesn’t confine himself to local politics. He’s worth looking at daily, IMHO.
Daniels is going to be the new pres of Purdue – to be announced tomorrow.
Maybe TPaw is the hyper vapid antidote to the incendiary Palin from last time.
I think he boils his ribeye.
dear ghod, yes. my reaction is NOOOOOOOOO.
And of course, he’s such a great white hunter!
True, but Indiana ia about as red as it gets. Not much resistance. But it is also true they like Mitch Their Man. But doesn’t he seem like a little Tee Paw?
This just can’t be serious. And I want to know about that bridge.
Body guy?
Oh well. Romney/Broke-Ass Romney 2012!
Are you trying to imply Tim Pawlenty is a furry? And no, I don’t have to google it.
http://my.firedoglake.com/Jane-2/2012/06/20/fdl-and-the-2012-election/#comment-264
It is truly an art form to be able to kiss up and still declare oneself superior to everybody in the room.
golf clap.
Mitch is off the market; it was announced today that he’s going to be the next president of Purdue University. He really doesn’t want to fuck around with having to actually scavenge votes at this point, since he knows he’s never going to get enough love from the wingnut/teabagger/crazy faction to get a presidential nomination. Much less actually get enough votes…although I thought the same thing about the Marquis. Big difference there is that Mittens had enough money of his own to bury his opponents in shit, and Mitch doesn’t.
Also, too – being a university president is a well-known launching pad for cabinet-level or seriously high level advisory positions. (See Summers, Larry, and Gates, Robert Jr.) Their (but not my) Man Mitch may yet have the opportunity to do for the rest of the country what he’s done for my fair state.
Looking forward to 2013 in the event of a Romney victory:
Annnnd…bidding is closed for Yellowstone National Park, and the winner is…the Marriott Corporation! And won’t those Grand Canyon walls make the coolest backdrop for a Marriott logo? Of course they will.
Nobody could have predicted…
“Hidden meaning relies on universal sexual energy”_
“Interdependence is an ingredient of an expression of sensations”
http://www.wisdomofchopra.com/
Thanks for the update info. I’ll have to try to remember where I picked up that idea, and reevaluate reliability of site.
Yeppers, wingnuts setting up totalitarian states in the academy for sure.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I-35W_Mississippi_River_bridge
If Pawlenty doesn’t work out, Romney should consider the giant one-eyed weasel in the blue tuxedo, who is apparently a friend of Pawlenty’s.
he’ll work hard for very little money based upon the delusional belief that one day the rich guy will notice him and reward him with untold riches.
“The rags to riches theme which has been associated with Horatio Alger’s stories is in no way accurate, as his heroes rarely become extremely wealthy. His characters usually hold ‘low-level jobs in companies, often attaining personal stability but not wealth or prominent position.’ Some of Alger’s novels assert that material wealth is insignificant unless it is paired with middle-class respectability. For Alger’s characters, wealth was the product of a meritocracy, and the direct consequence of ‘honesty, thrift, self-reliance, industry, a cheerful whistle and an open manly face.’”
“In 2008, Sarah Palin boasted that she stopped the ‘bridge to nowhere’. This year, Tim Pawlenty is running, with a track record of making bridges go…nowhere”
The authors of a new book out about Christie full of stories that just happen to reveal his monumental patriotism and great burning desire from a very young age to serve the country were being pimped by the authors on NPR last week.
Somebody over at Jane’s house complained that ‘TBogg was vulgar’. Vulgar?
How do they manage to read the Rude Pundit without having a stroke? Has the whole world now been challenged to enter the New World of Prissyness?
How many conservatives does it take to ruin America’s infrastructure?
Pawlenty.
If furry-curious Tim Pawlenty-Boring manages to keep GOP delegates awake long enough to support him as a Veep-candidate, any Democratic Party-aligned PAC would be nutz not to air a commercial in an endless loop until Election Day showing the collapse of the I-35W Mississippi River Bridge with the caption:
In May 2007, then-Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty vetoed a bill that would pay to fix bridges in Minnesota.
In August 2007, this happened.
13 of his fellow Minnesotans died and 145 were injured because Tim Pawlenty signed a pledge to people no one voted for to never raise taxes.
And Mitt Romney believes he should be one step away from the Presidency.
Calling TBogg vulgar was a complaint? Whitman was famously called vulgar. Twain of course had the whole thing down.
“They calls me a bummer and a gin sot too / But what cares I for praise?”
It’s the curse of being articulate:
You use all the words, not just some of them.
VULGARIAN!
UNAUTHORISED!
UNREGISTERED!
MEANY!
At this stage, I’m not at all certain that FDL is worthy of TBogg, much less the Bassets. Divorces are sometimes the best thing.
The running mate has to be more boring than the candidate. Finding one is hard.
oh noes.. the prissy firebaggers are firing on tbogg …again ..
well thank gawd for “sticks n stones” eh ..
FDL has been no bueno for ca-ca for about two years now ..
and if christie’s “patriotism” is the size of his big old belly .. heaven save us all …
fuck ‘em .. feed ‘em fish-heads ..
Obviously, he washes the cheese slice wrappers, presses them under his only heavy book — Atlas Shrugged — and then returns them to the store for the recycling fee.
Daniels has said “Yes!” to the presidency of Purdue University; presumably the selection committee of the Board of Trustees asked for a longer commitment than ten weeks.
Adding: word must be going out from the inner circle of the Romney Temple to the Veep also-rans if they picking up other gigs. When Jeb!’s apostasy is followed a week later by Daniels’ acceptance of Purdue’s offer, it’s likely the Dear John letters/calls/emails/faxes are arriving at dear friends’ homes, those closest to the other contenders who can be trusted to carry Mitt’s word to the men not chosen.
Mitchie-poo is slick enough to have the press eating from his hand, but he’s almost too slick for his own good — Romney’s gotta worry about being overshadowed by the guy, much as Poppy Bush worried about being overshadowed by Bob Dole and so went with Dan Quayle instead.
That’s why I figure it’s gotta be Portman — he’s got the Bush Admin CV like Daniels, coupled with the dull-as-dirt non-charisma of Pawlenty.
And there you go. Thanks for confirming that it’s not gonna be Mitch.
Uh, not exactly nowhere; down is most certainly a direction, just not a desireable one (in this case).
I can’t imagine the Purdue University would accept a Veep opt-out clause for The Wee One, but perhaps Columbia had a similar deal with Ike, seeing how he was talked up for the Presidency (of the US) throughout his Presidency (of Columbia — the University not the country).
Would a ten-week tenure accrue to Purdue’s benefit? Or Daniels’?
I think not, this job is sure to mean he’s off Mitt’s Veep list. He is very short, after all. In a debate, he’d be dwarfed by Biden.
Zing!
The ones doing the Big Screech are all upset that Jane’s finally a) set up some choice ground rules and b) showed she was willing to lower the banhammer to enforce them. By way of response, they’re now accusing her of somehow playing favorites with TBogg, their entire argument apparently based on spite, sealing wax and bailing wire.
During the entire 2008 primary season, depending on what stories hit the front page at any given time, Jane was being accused by various partisans of being in the tank for Obama, Hillary or Edwards, and she’s not going to let them take over the site this year. At least three of the worst loonies are now gone for good, and at least one of the remaining ones has admitted he was banned before but came back under a new name. (By the way, that won’t be possible anymore from what I undestand.)
I guess we have to add “ex post facto” right after “separation of powers” as another concept the “screechers” don’t quite understand.
GWPDA casts out the blasphemer:
VULGARIAN!
UNAUTHORISED!
UNREGISTERED!
MEANY!
Or, Christendom’s Premier Fucking Fool, I’m cool with that.
See what I mean [laughing] about using all the words?