Taking time out from insulting the rest of humanity who are not named “Romney”, Mitt “Mitt” Romney was all, “No way, José ….and not the José I fired because I’m running for President, for Pete’s sake” about releasing any more of his tax returns that could possibly show investment income coming from, say, cat brothels or showing that maybe he has more secret overseas accounts with names like Stolen Nazi Gold LLC or Dancing Horse Sperm Futures OPEC. I mean, anything could be in those tax returns so you should feel free to speculate wildly.
I know I am.
But here is what Mitt’s people had to say today while all the time realizing that they will not hear the end of this from reporters who are going to annoy the shit out of them about this from now until like two days before election day when Mitt will say, “Well, we’ll see…” just like your parents used to tell you when you asked for a pony – that you still haven’t received – because your parents were just big fat liars who wouldn’t deal with you honestly and now when you visit them at their adult care facility and they ask if you’ll come again next week, you say “Well, we’ll see …” and then trail off because… revenge.
Oh yeah, here is Mitt saying “Bite me, poors and blahs. Ha Ha Ha. Money rulz!.”:
Mitt Romney’s campaign said Monday they would not release any more of the candidate’s personal income tax information, despite an acknowledgement from Romney that he had been audited in the past.
“Mitt Romney has paid his taxes in full compliance with U.S. Law, and he has paid 100 percent of what he has owed,” Romney spokesman Ryan Williams wrote.
He continued, “As has previously been reported, in 2011, the Romneys will pay more than $3.2 million in taxes on $20.9 million in mostly investment income and will have donated more than $4 million to charity. In 2010, The Romneys paid more than $3 million in taxes on $21.6 million in mostly investment income and donated nearly $3 million to charity.”
Romney has disclosed his income tax returns from 2010, and released an estimate of his 2011 tax information in April. He has vowed to release 2011′s full return one it’s completed by his accountant.
On an unrelated note, there are probably no exceedingly profitable white baby breeding farms hidden in South America that sell matched sets of blonde-haired blue-eyed children to future Supreme Court justices… so please forget I even mentioned it in conjunction with Mitt Romney’s Highly-Secretive No-Peeking, You Big Loser tax returns and his unexplained hundreds of millions of dollars hidden all over the world.