Goddamn, this is funny.

Everyone off the roads! The collective livers of sane-Americans is/are about to go on life support. I’m gonna save mine by not watching the Leona Helmsey of Republican politics.

I’m good with all of it but I think it would be more appropriate, if she mentions the Salt Lake Olympics, to have 5 shots of this. It doesn’t taste extraordinary but perhaps it’s a religious experience.

I hope there will be drinking games for all of the rest of the snoozefest, particularly for the ZEGS speech.

It’s whiskeysoda right now – it’s the only way to keep teh Mormon missionaries away – other than teh mezuzah on teh doorframe. Trust me – in Feenix, the combination of teh mezuzah and teh Dog of Great Barking haz driven more ‘missionaries’ from the door than it’s possible to imagine.

Mentions unzipping Mitt – drink…ah hell, just shoot yourself.

Hey, hey, hey—-Martha’s a big Dem, has long worked (for reals) for a living and is actually kinda cool. Marie Ann-Romnette is not fit to shine her shoes.

Likewise, I’m pretty sure it would be one of those “strapping young lads” (drink) babbling about what a gentle and attentive lover Paul Ryan is. Which would be soooooo teh awesome if true.

Did Santorum or anyone else say “blah people” yet? That’s got to be worth at least a quart of Mad Dog. (Can’t watch the Gooper-jerk so my current drinking game consists of downing a shot every time I hear “can I get you another?” from across the bar.)

Liver wreckage ensues in any r-Money drinking game…
My 24 yr clean/sober down the drain might result in political violence of… well, nasty scale.

Surreal? … it’s like watching Un Chien Andalou…

Looks–or perhaps, sounds–like Rinse and Boner decided to play the game with an advance copy of Ann’s speech.

I much preferred watching Cindy McCain screaming like a soccer hooligan from the sidelines as Sarah Palin oozed sarcasm out her nostrils.

I’m playing the game with shots of Postum.

When I lived in The Tucson my door signs read:

Please Don’t Pimp Your Children

and

I’ll read your tract if you’ll drink my beer

Does that means they’re going to drag a couple priests through the hall? Or just beat the crap out of a gay Marine?

It would be unprofessional not to speculate if Paul Ryan doesn’t ogle Ann’s ass…

Or if Peggy Noonan puts down the martini shaker long enough to make a grab for Paul Ryan’s ass.

Excuse me while I throw up now.

She’s going to humanize Mitt? Sorry, but Chris Christy already gave away the game: everyone is going to have to suffer a little. Those who have gained a lot will suffer a little. Those who have lost everything will suffer a lot. The Big Boy can’t keep his mouth shut: the blind, the disabled, the old and the poor? – you get to suffer some more.

Oh, and the Ginormous One thinks Romney maybe shouldn’t have drifted over into birther land.

Ann could offer a lifetime supply of Xanax to every citizen and she couldn’t undo what the Governor of Bacon unleashed this morning.

That undoing, of course, will be up to the Democrats. Fumble this one, guys, and you’re going back to reserves.

Just the GOP up to its elbows in sanctimony.

Also gud responses. They reject teh Jehovah’s Witnesses as well.

Still, teh sign of teh Joos? SKARREY!

He was complaining about how bad CA is, earlier today, seeing as we prefer electing Ds. We’d rather see him investigated for corruption.

Humanize Mitt? Doesn’t that require a Blue Fairy, a talking cricket, and a giant whale?

I’m not playing on the grounds that I would have to get drunk in order to tolerate watching Ann Rmoney.

How does a liar, a cheat, a man who destroyed countless lives become a bishop in the Mormon church?

Ask the Mormon church if they are doing the work of Jesus or Satan.

http://www.ldschurchtemples.com/temples/

*cough* … I’m only getting into a drinkin’ game if there’s French Toast for brekkie tomorrow …

ROFL … Excellent !

Mitt is going to lift up America … I wonder if that means both tits and ass ?

OMG … PW !

I wonder if that means both tits and ass ?

Hmmm. Do they make magical undies in the tummy control/push up variety?

I thought I was a Snark Professional, but I bow before your genius.

Oh lord. The heart talk.

There are two American families Ann who hate each other. Your side made sure of it.

ANN Cares about people who don’t have money?

Lie.

I wonder if Ann selected her lipstick first, or her dress…? ;-)

Red on red.

Ann shouts “I love you women.” bc the GOP doesnt. Mitt knows he/GOP are in trouble with women voters.

Why is Ann’s hair not blond in her younger days?

It’s not tinted Blond … that’s homespun Gold from the Cayman Islands !

What would be a ‘fake’ wedding, Ann…?

Ann you have the best health care in the world.

Shut up about your MS. We can’t even afford to see a doctor out here even while paying a third of our salary for junk insurance.

Is the drinking game canceled if the speaker shows up drunk?

Maybe it’s just adrenalin, but this woman is definitely under the influence of something.

I think she started by saying that Mitt Romney was her child. Can’t be sure because I started the drinking game early, and was already confused when Rick Santorum was prying the cold dead hands of the free market from something or other.

Your right. Romney gave Ann what she wanted most: golden hair. Ha ha ha ha ha

I think “whimmin’” was Ann’s first horse….

‘Dressage – sniff glue made from the late great Rafalca. Fucking loser.’

brilliant TBogg

The new fascist cry: let’s go Mitt.

Steal it. Oh you did already.

Good God! Where the hell have you been?

I didn’t see the red nails. Red on red on red.

And Mitt gives some of his blood money back to the church of Satan. So there.

Shorter Ann: Who’re you gonna believe … me or yer lyin’ Eyes ?!!

Show your taxes Ann. Then we’ll talk.

Wow. Ann’s going to make sure Mitt is put into the White House herself.

Does Mitt know she’s raiding the offshore accounts?

She wants us to date Mitt?

For god’s sake Ann think of the grandchildren.

If I watch any more of this Stepford Wife, I’m gonna end up in a Bottle …

Every one of her talking points have been refuted over and over, she is throwing fuel on the flames that will destroy Romney’s campaign, no matter how much $$$ the Kochroaches spend.

take me home from the dance

Real life break. Interesting, it’s sort of like a more colorful and pungent version of the Internet, and curiously well-lit. I’m not sure I’d recommend it.

Mitt. President of the Corporate State. Happiness on Nov 6th for his peeps.

We can trust Mitt because he brought Ann home safe from the dance? Was she expecting a rufie in her fruit punch?

HI!!! Start drinking. Would you prefer challah or cinnamon bread?

He gallantly drank it for her. Then drove her home.

Vote Mitt in 2012!

Yes that really was the most confusing speech, just in terms of the grammar, or even just logic. “As a mother of five, our country is…”

I won’t clip those coupons then, but I’m damn glad you’re back!

You’ve been missed, sir/madam!

Do we have to watch Teh Joisey Whale?

Anyone want to guess his weight?

Aw. That’s nice!

400

Wow that was good. This speech should definitely be outlawed.

Maybe he’ll get better, but I really expected a better speech from Christie…. I really did. Where’s Ann Coulter???

Someone said that same number to me yesterday and I don’t disbelieve it – I just can’t even imagine it. He is going to die, and soon, if he stays like that.

Well, my alarm clock howls at me in 7 hours so I have an excuse to stop torturing myself. There will be French toast for breakfast tomorrow, by special request from a special pup. Sleep well, y’all.

The money boys won’t put their money behind him for prez. Unless of course they can have Dick Cheney as number 2 ready to step in to the top spot.

Yeah I agree. He’s not so much nasty and thuggish as billed and expected as he is like something small and yapping.

The background isn’t helping, I think. I keep expecting it to morph into the wall in that movie where Al Pacino played the devil as a the head of a law firm, with writhing figures embraced in Satanic sensual embrace.

Wow!!! Ann sure locked up the highly coveted vapid country club wife demographic with her incomprehensible homecoming speech, huh??

Mitt going for Hip Hop gold with his spoken word thingy? Wonder who his fly girls will be…

Well Nikki Haley WAS wearing a considerable amount of bling this evening…

I personally eagerly await Guido Christie bustin’ a move (if he’s capable of doing so), spinning on his back, pop n locking, etc….

{{{ Marion }}}

Either one, I love them both … thanks !

Hey, it could be a lot worse – can you imagine what a speech by Callista Gingrich would sound and look like? I can only imagine the medications that would be required to overcome the Stepford Wives effect.

Come to think of it, maybe we saw those medications at work this evening.

I had a mezzuzah on door frame, and they still bothered me (years ago in Akron, OH). So I answered the door with my tarantula sitting atop my head (coolest yarmulke EVAR!). No more annoying xtian mythology salesmen.

Shorter Ann Romney: You can trust Mitt! He bought me a pony!

I missed this post last night, and I sorely needed it.

Turned on the TV and there she was: a bottle-blonde snobby harridan in Nancy Reagan RED shrieking at me about how faaaaaaabulous hubby Bishop Willard is. Oh please! STFU. Grabbed the clicker and ran.

Thanks for laffs this morning.

I thought about that while watching last night. If Newtie had won, and we were treated to Callistas “the night I met Newt” stories.

I liked Annies, “This Man will Not Fail!” I’m thinking, you’re right, Annie. He won’t fail, he’s got enough money he’s going to be allright no matter what. The rest of us? Not so much.