But… but… You’re an internet person! You’re not supposed to have a real life! You’re supposed to be just like your weird little internet friends and only exist here, on these pages!

Well, maybe when we fall off (roll slowly down) the Fiscal Gentle Slope That We Really, Really Need To Panic Over Right Now you’ll have enough stupid flying around that you’ll want to write more. Or, Oilbummer will end SS and Medicare and sell us all as indentured servants to the MotUs and you can help keep the brave Saint Dr. Steins out there from leading the True Progressive Revolution, since you’re such an O-Bot. Or something.

Well, good. I thought maybe you were busy getting boned by General Petraeus.

Wherever do you get these book covers? They’re brilliant!

Love That Made a Panty-Waist Into a Man?

Say no more. Please say no more.

“…job which had become a mind-numbing soul-deadening humiliating exercise in futility only made bearable by the promise of an early death.” You read my mind. We try to imagine grandchildren or something to continue for, but even that’s not always enough. (They’ll do fine without us, after all, if we’ve really done our jobs.) Some life-crisis that has no evo-psych or whatever label.

Hope the new job renews. (Sounds kinda exciting, actually.) Good for all of us, meanwhile, to spend less time with the intertubes and more with our spice and doggies and beaches (or cold stretches of snow, should those reappear on this overwarmed stretch of New England).

In every very funny TBogg post, there’s a tiny, sometimes hidden nugget of truth:

(see illustration above)

Yeah, I know. Those days, with the morning throat-warble of the Tufted Jonah, the obstinate snarl of the brindled Sullivan, the hyena laugh of the mottled Brooks, the brain-dead voting of the populace who let it get close enough for Dubya to steal — twice — those days seem to be going if not quite gone. The public has largely caught on to the lies which seem to be getting clumsier all the time.

Oh, for the times when the voters would ride the frog of the republic out to the middle of the lake, whoop “C’est le Inhofe!” and plunge the stinger in.

Eh, no.

Right. 1) Win teh internets. 2) ??? 3) Profit! Good luck with that.

Meanwhile, I notice with some dismay that your “leaving time for all things non-bloggy and personal” list did NOT include teh boys. Not a single mention; no walks, no snuggles, no quality time. Nothing. But they’re going to find out eventually, and then you will pay.

I know what you mean, at least in terms of the political part. I think a lot of us are experiencing an odd sensation since early November, one that, as Democrats, we’re simply not accustomed to or equipped for. My understanding from others who are familiar with it is that it’s called “happiness”, and it’s nothing to be afraid of.

Symptoms include lack of desire to click on Nate Silver’s blog obsessively, a strange interest in the outside world excluding politics, and lack of stimulus in the form of emails from relatives asking “You follow this stuff, please reassure me for God’s sake that Sarah Palin John McCain Paul Ryan That Other Guy Whatever His Name Is I Forget* isn’t going to win”

I know, it’s strange. I think it’s a positive thing though, from what they tell me, but apparently a bit of an acquired taste, like really stinky French cheese or pain au chocolat, but once you get used to chocolate first thing in the morning it’s actually pretty addicting, the only downside of course being that you start expecting it all the time, and I can’t find a good one here to save my life.

Sorry, I seem to have taken a detour. My solution is that I’m going back to where you can get decent pastries made fresh every day (the secret is butter. Simple as that). I’ve seen you through this election thing, now it’s time to return to the land of food.

*The actual official new GOP/FOX News name for Mittens Romney.

I won’t tell you to ‘know Joey teh Scar’ for inspiration – but watching a minute or so of the clown might serve as useful pump priming. Or a means of getting rid of that ancient analog set u use on teh patio while waiting for teh Dogs to finish up.

Asian Cheerleader Butt-Sluts Vols. VI – XXIV

Vol. VIII-XIV were real let downs. The plot was obviously threadbare. It greatly improved when they brought in Wes Anderson to reboot the franchise.

This is also That Time of Year when everyone, I think, gets tired and wrapped up in holiday stuff.

Yeah, I thought it sort of went off the rails of believability with Asian Cheerleader Butt-Sluts XIX when they brought in the character of Jar Jar Ron Jeremy. Before that the scenarios were totally credible.

This is not to say that blogging won’t continue, I just need to work out a new schedule, get my head back in the game and wait for someone to do or say something truly stupid on the internet and then I’ll be as right as rain.

Also learn new positions that allow you to multitask.

Exactly right, Tbogg. I’m an older man than you, and take my word for it… Stop and smell the roses. Gather ye rosebuds while ye may. Consider the lillies of the field. Use it or lose it. And don’t, even late at night, allow yourself to consider the possibility that someday the L&T Casey might meet and marry a Texas Aggie, whose name is Bascom Funches, but he prefers to go by Tag. Sure, he likes to talk about how he could invest his own money much better than Social Security, is sort of leaning toward the Libertarian Party, but you can take it and smile thinly during the brief times the two of you are together. Don’t worry, they’ll never need to move back in with you. And even if they do, it will mean learning to appreciate the basics of life. Good night, Ms. Tbogg. Good Night, Casey. Good, Night Little Tag. Oh yeah, you too Bascom.

Oh, I’m sorry. No kidding, enjoy yourself, Tbogg.

Mission Accomplished! due in no small part to Ghost ACORN

It appears you’ve left out the New Black Panther Party. No way it could have happened without their egregious and threatening voter intimidation tactics. Probably an oversight.

Don’t be so modest. You also side-lined St. Tebow with that elbow to the ribs.

Congratulations on the new job and the…..er…..bondage.

I’m sure the Republicans will soon do something so stupid and venal that you’ll get right back into the snark.

Number 3.
I knew we did that one! Tell me, do you know who has the heart attack gun right now? I could use it for a bit, if no one minds me borrowing it. Promise I’d only use it for the betterment of mankind and living things in general…except for the people who might have unexpected heart attacks, that is….

Thanks for the update.

You make my daily search through the blogs worthwhile.

As long as there is a dead Breitbart, we’ll all see you soon.

“…wait for someone to do or say something truly stupid on the internet…”

See you soon!

Well, if you’re waiting for something stupid being said on the intertubes, your wait is over, thanks to this gem:

In an interview preceding the succession announcement, Sen. DeMint said he is taking the Heritage job because he sees it as a vehicle to popularize conservative ideas in a way that connects with a broader public. “This is an urgent time,” the senator said, “because we saw in the last election we were not able to communicate conservative ideas that win elections.”

They were able to communicate conservative ideas, all right, it’s just that a majority of the electorate thought that the ideas being communicated were really shitty ideas.

When they can come up with something besides “let’s stop all the blacks, browns and poors from voting so we can finish looting the country”, let me know. I’ll be in that cantina down the beach…

Ah, it’s only a couple years ’til the mid-terms- you’ll figure out how to work blogging into an honest days’ work by then. You know the weirdness can only ramp up, look at how bizarre it got for this e-lekshun!

Congrats on the new job, it must mean the economy is on the mend- thanks to BarryO and his band of bad-asses.

So the ransom note is a plea for “someone to do or say something truly stupid on the internet”? I’ll hold my breath.

Meanwhile, focus on your avocation as pooper-scooper in the sunset. Very rewarding.

Fuck you for having a life.

anyway

Quadrennial Sparkle Pony Merry-Go-Round

Understand the reference but please stop indirectly associating my favorite show with those crackpots.

I’m torn between wanting to ask all the pseudo-prog third-party fart-heads if they’ve heard anything from Roseanne Barr since the election, and never wanting to hear about Roseanne Barr ever again.

Nice to see the TBoggs exploring the exciting world of erotic asphyxiation together. No fur-lined cuffs for you’uns, no sir.

Also, I’d like to suggest the Josh Romney Project, in which we check in on Mr. Creepy Stare every once in a while, just to see how he is, you know, if he’s doing OK, going on extended unexplained absences, removing the occasional wheelbarrow of dirt from his unfinished basement, that sort of thing.

Homeland is the US remake (loosely) of Hatufim or Prisoners of War from Israel. A masterpiece television series and well worth checking out.

Can also recommend two Danish thrillers: Foybredelsen Season 1 and Season 3 and Borgen (a political thriller). Foybredelsen is as good as the UK’s Prime Suspect. (The BBC airs both with English subtitles.)

I, for one, am grateful for this. I’m retired, so checking the Internet each morning is different for me than for the folks who use their work-supplied computers to shop and look at stuff totally unrelated to their jobs in order to get through the day partly sane.

Waking up to Tbogg is supposed to be just a pleasurable little junket to start each day. Pour coffee, check Tbogg, scan other “news”, and get on with my life. But this site had begun to cramp my actual real life because it is the only one where I can’t walk away without reading each and every comment.

So, I get the initial jolt of whatever funny/tragic thing Mr. Bogg says, but then I have to hang around for all his smart and snarky little Internet friends to chime in. That means not only another cup of coffee, but sometimes another pot. And before you know it, I haven’t done a bunch of things I wanted to do and It’s All Your Damned Fault.

A tiny little break from all this will do all of us a world of good, maybe. And, after some of the marathon comment threads that came from interlopers sneaking in the kitchen window to tell us all how horrible and depraved and just downright wrong is Tbogg and his O-Bot pals and such, we can smell fresh air again and think about long walks on the beach even if we don’t live near the TBogg family. And after that picture of them above, I’m certainly glad I’m not within earshot of all those goings on. You know they’re not quiet when they’re doing the whips and chains stuff.

I must admit, its something to behold .. our national state of ennui in the face of the impending Mayan Apocalypse-fiscal abyss-debt ceiling Armageddon-Christmas war warring-austerity carpet bombing-Euro rapture.

It’s like, Glen Beck is selling his own urine and nobody bats an eyelid.
What can the Mongol hordes possibly do for an encore? Ho-hum.

As long as you keep providing us with that sweet, sweet basset pr0n every Thursday, all will be well.

Heck, posting less often is just as much fun and just as good as it was before, but once someone creates blogger vliagra people will expect you to thrown down every 4 hours, day in, day out, forever. Such is life, especially with help from big pharma…

Congrats on the new, non-life-force-sucking job.

Excuse me, Mr Bogg, sir, but I hope we will still get our Thursday basset fix.
Please, sir, if you could just see your way clear to see to that, I, for one, should appreciate it very much.

Are you actually taking time off to go through testosterone replacement therapy?

I heard unconditional political support can leave you impotent.

Projecting much?

I hear ya, T. I mean, how many posts can one write about John McCain being “disturbed?”

And I, for one, cannot wait, CANNOT WAIT, for Ashley Judd to be in the Senate. Maybe she can move to South Carolina. Tomorrow.

There’s probably a site but our noble host is keeping it all to himself, not that I blame him. About a thousand years ago — that is, in the early 1960s — I used to babysit for a family where the dad was a devotee of sleazy paperbacks, which I would browse for cheap thrills after the baby went to sleep … but I must admit that TBogg’s selections are even sleazier than the ones I remember. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

You forgot the incessant whining chirp of the spectacled Will.

“…and wait for someone to do or say something truly stupid…”

Well, THAT didn’t take long:

http://talkingpointsmemo.com/archives/2012/12/this_may_take_a_while.php?ref=fpblg

Nice to see the TBoggs exploring the exciting world of erotic asphyxiation together. No fur-lined cuffs for you’uns, no sir.

I just keep remembering the cartoon which featured the caption “Doo-oo-ing what comes naturally!” I can’t describe it because my computer starts blushing and goes into “sleep mode” for about a half-hour (if you know what I mean and I think you do).

Also, too, wetsuits, ballgags and a carrot.

Anyway, Just as an aside, your library must be _amazing_. I’m jealous.

Hey, gannonguckert old fella! How’s tricks??

I can relate to all you say, xpurg (you won’t mind if I call you xpurg for short, will you?), but to judge by the extreme wit and poesy of this thread, the rest period is already short-lived. I just spent a mortal 15-20 mins of my remaining time on this ball of minerals chuckling and exclaiming my way thru it.

TBogg, I’m sure you can evolve a way to combine the conversion from panty-waist to real man with Thursday Bassett Blogging. There are these multiple-strand leashes you can get.

Asian Cheerleader Butt-Sluts

Not that damned Malkin video again? Really, I don’t think I could handle another viewing.

Work is a bitch.