NYT Culture Hate Hate Hated That Gay Math Wizard Guy

By: Monday July 22, 2013 3:41 pm

As you may have heard, Nate Silver, who is the Punxsutawney Phil of electoral prognosticators, emerging  from his Fortress of Gay Mathmagic every four years to choose our president for us so that we have more time to devote to eating Hot Pockets, watching reality teevee shows, and developing diabetes foot, has taken  leave from [...]

Leprechaun? More Like ‘Leprecum’, Amirite?

By: Monday July 1, 2013 10:53 pm

General Mills is celebrating the fact that the Supreme Court told us we all have to get gay married now (It is the law of the land. DO IT! GAY DO IT!) by issuing special edition boxes of Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs Lucky Charms containing rainbow-hued marshmallow treats in the shape of rainbows because, you [...]

Homo Nomo To Be Homo Nomo-ing Nomo

By: Wednesday June 19, 2013 10:56 pm

Pray the Gay Away fake church Exodus International is calling it quits: Exodus International, the oldest and largest Christian ministry dealing with faith and homosexuality announced tonight that it’s closing its doors after three-plus decades of ministry. The Board of Directors reached a decision after a year of dialogue and prayer about the organization’s place [...]

Baby Please Don’t Go

By: Wednesday May 29, 2013 9:23 am

Unwitting hubby beard and former baby harvester Michele Bachmann is calling it quits hanging ‘em up, running away, pulling the plug, hitting the road after derailing her own crazy train, and bugging out way more than usual: Representative Michele Bachmann, the Minnesota Republican who made an ill-fated run for the Republican presidential nomination in 2012, [...]

Accidentally Like A Martyr

By: Friday May 17, 2013 2:03 pm

Don’t tell me not to fly, I simply got to If someone takes a spill, it’s me and not you Who told you you’re allowed to rain on my parade   -Merrill/Styne As part of my continuing series on “why we can’t have nice things”… I have previously expressed my, well, let’s call it “displeasure” with [...]

Lindsey Graham Dodges A Big Gay Bullet

By: Friday March 29, 2013 1:08 pm

Down South Carolin-ey way where the the former Governor recently returned to run for office once again (he is tan, rested and depleted of man gravy after humping hiking the Appalachian Trail), and where former Board of Education Chairwoman Kristin Macguire used to like to scribble little forget-me-nots on state issued Post-It notes like: “I’m your [...]

Maggie, I Wish I’d Never Seen Your Face

By: Friday January 4, 2013 2:18 am

Homo-hatin’ Maggie Gallagher is hanging it up, and by ‘hanging it up’ I mean that Universal Uclick is “retiring her column“, and by ‘retiring her column’ they mean they can’t find anyone who wants to pay for the right to run Gallagher’s column anymore. So sad. Keep in mind that Uclick manages to syndicate both [...]

Roberts Court Agrees To Go Balls Deep In The Gay

By: Friday December 7, 2012 1:04 pm

Good news/bad news for the gays as the 6 out of 9 Catholic Supreme Court justices have agreed to decide whether non-opposite marriage is kosher with the dead founding fathers: The U.S. Supreme Court will take up the issue of gay marriage for the first time, agreeing to rule on a California ballot measure banning [...]

Mitt Romney Don’ Know Nothin’ ‘Bout Birthin’ No Gay Babies

By: Saturday October 27, 2012 3:13 pm

Previously former Governor Mitt “Mitt” Romney did not understand how the Gheys were having their gay babies together, what with the matched sets of vags and peens; how does this work? Nowadays he can just have a father/spawn talk with son Tagg “Tagg” Romney about these how fake babies are made and suddenly, for Mitt, all [...]

Unskewed Studmuffin Dean Chambers Does Not Care For Nate Silver’s Dickless Polling

By: Friday October 26, 2012 10:52 am

Unskewed numbers genius and human gravy manufacturing plant Dean Chambers wants you to know that Nate Silver is skewing those poll numbers because he is either queerer than a three dollar bill (so, you know, he probably not using straight heterosexual math where 1+1 = 2 but instead uses gay math like Adam + Steve [...]

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